Tuesday Requires More Energy

Only Tuesday & It Has Already Been A Painful Week Emotionally!

How is it only Tuesday? It feels like it should at least be Thursday! Many things have occurred already for me that have been both physically and mentally painful. Stress always causes additional pain, but this is ridiculous. Of course, weather can also increase my physical pain and Mother Nature can’t decide if she wants to rain or be sunny, so it has been both within minutes of each other.

I have always been the type of person that thinks of everyone and anyone else long before myself. I will not lie to you and say I am trying to fix that about me because I am not. I am trying to eliminate stress as much as I can, but that is extremely challenging for me. Sometimes it seems like stress comes in several different storms and on many different levels of severity. I am not naive enough to think I can fix other people’s issues, but I cannot help trying to alleviate some of other people’s pain and heartache. Truthfully, it does not work and I know that will never change.

With all that said there is a beautiful quote I thought would be good to share with y’all. This might help y’all if you are having a difficult or frustrating week. Or it might just make you think about someone else that might need a little support and love from someone that cares! Sometimes while it is necessary to spread the love to others, it is also important to show yourself a little love as well! I would love to read your thoughts on this quote, please!

Thank you for taking the time to stop by my site today and read what I have wrote. I hope the quote I have shared with y’all will have some meaning to you and prove you with positive feelings. I hope your week is going well so far and truly hope you are continuing to stay safe. I hope you will never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and many positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Random thoughts Sunday!

As the weekend comes to an end…

Good evening y’all! How was your weekend? I hope you had a great and safe weekend! I will be honest, I did not do much over the weekend. I think y’all already know that I do my best to not leave the house because I am terrified of COVID-19 and unfortunately, the state I live in is not doing the best with new cases and deaths. I don’t even leave the house to go grocery shopping because hardly anyone wears a mask and NO ONE respects social distancing, which I find very irritating because I am HIGH RISK!

Considering I try not leaving the house, I have been ordering my groceries online and having them delivered. Last weekend, I did the same thing I always do with grocery shopping and had an awful experience. I try to never complain because the people doing the shopping for me are really doing me a favor and I would even say keep me safer. However, when I request to be contacted when the store does not have the product on my list in stock and not make substitutions on their own, that is what I expect. This always worked so well each of the four previous times I did the online ordering, but last weekend nothing went the way it was supposed to.

Even though last weekend did not go well, I ordered again online for delivery yesterday. The lady sent me a text when she started the shopping and when the store did not have what I requested and when she was done and on her way to my house. I thanked this lady, Norma many times. I even told her why I wasn’t going to stores. She told me she understood and that her mother has MS. I thanked her several times during the time she was shopping and she actually bought me a small flower arrangement. I was so shocked and wanted to share this with y’all. Norma restored my faith in good people in the south!

Honestly, I have spent several days wanting to write about something and couldn’t get the words out. It was driving me crazy because I had a few days without work and I wanted to be able to do what I enjoy doing, which is writing. I have been struggling with a few topics that have a lot of meaning to me, but that also comes with a terrible amount of anger. I have always been a kind, caring, and happy person and do not like being angry. What has been going on in the country I was born and raised in is terrible and very upsetting. Politics is frustrating and I know we all have our own opinions on it. It doesn’t matter if we are Republican or Democratic, what matters is fairness and treating people equally and with respect.

Something else that has been weighing heavily on my mind is this situation with Jeffrey Epstein (who is deceased) and Ghislaine Maxwell. The connections these awful people had are deep within the rich and powerful people of the world and that includes politicians. The awful things Epstein and Maxwell did to young girls was traumatizing and life-altering to them. NO child should ever see or experience what the young girls that were lured into Epstein’s circle did and anyone and everyone that was involved should pay the consequences to the fullest of the law. This is a very sensitive and difficult subject for me and it had caused me a lot of anger and sadness!

Normally, I hand write all my posts first and then type them. I know how insane that might sound, but it typically works for me. I feel more connected with what I am writing when I do it by hand, but I am doing this post by typing what I am thinking and not over thinking it like I tend to do, so I hope you can feel what I am writing as deeply as I do. I would really love to read your thoughts on this post and I promise to respond as quickly as I can.

I hope you enjoyed your weekend and you stayed safe! Have you ever noticed how long the work week can feel and then how short the weekends are? Granted I am enjoying my job and love that I get to work from home, especially considering COVID numbers are on a steady increase daily. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and many positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Feelings that have built up

Beware in advance, I want y’all to know this post is the most personal I have written and extremely emotional. It is also rather long, but not as long as at least one another post.

Everyone’s life unfolds in unique and often challenging ways. No matter how things appear on the outside, no one has the “picture perfect” life. Our lives are full of happy times and hard times, which might not be equal. When someone experiences something that is painfully difficult and they somehow overcome those times, others may not know how in the world they overcame such tragic times and they never ask. How many times have we been asked in life if there was anything we would change? I can recall countless times, but my answer will never change. Anything that occurred in life that was hard, I feel that I am strong because of the hardest times in life and therefore would not change anything at all.

How would you respond if I were to ask you, what would you change in your life if you could? Sure, there are probably hard times you might wish you did not encounter. If those hard times never happened, would you still be the person you are today? Maybe you would, but maybe you wouldn’t. I say this because things I went through in life, I don’t know if I would be who I am if those things didn’t happen.

2020 has been a difficult year so far and we do not know when or if things will improve. I want to believe that what the United States has witnessed will open everyone’s eyes to the state of our nation. We have NOT had ANY leadership over the past three and a half years. We have watched what feels like the fall of a country that was supposed to be “strong”, “fair”, and “equal”. The entire world was exposed to COVID-19 and most other countries acted in a way that protected the citizens when the United States acted late which caused hundreds of thousands of people to unnecessary lose their lives. There is no way to know if the government had acted sooner, those lives lost could have been saved, and sadly that is what these individual’s families must live with.

Unfortunately, there are still way too many people that believe the lies the president says and tweets. These are the same people that follow their “leaders” example and fail to wear masks when out in public and seem to not understand what is meant by social distancing. I guess it makes sense because we all saw the president and the crowd on the 4th of July close together possibly spreading the virus to one another and yet somehow magically neither the president nor vice president seems to get the virus. Y’all already know that I am terrified of the virus and I do have a weakened immune system because of the medication I take for Multiple Sclerosis.

I will say that finally, several states have made masks when out in public mandatory. Those that fail to comply with wearing masks will be fined. I hardly leave the house these days but did go to the pharmacy on Friday. They had in huge sign in bold letters saying that all customers entering the store must wear a mask or they will be asked to leave immediately.

It has also been made painfully clear that the United States has enormous problems with racial injustice and police killing unarmed black people. I am not naïve enough or blind to the fact that not all American’s are treated equally and it makes me feel shame for the country.

All my life I have always treated everyone the same and never judged anyone based on anything besides the way they treated others. I appreciate the beauty in the differences others show and find those distinctions fascinating. I think if we were all exactly the same, this world would be rather boring and we would miss out on some incredible opportunities.

We are already more than halfway through 2020. The news has put a lot of focus onto either COVID-19, politics, police brutality or the latest with the Epstein insanity. For starters, the United States knew about COVID-19 on January 20, 2020, but did not act on it until March. That left about a month and a half for the virus to spread throughout the country. How many months did the president say this highly contagious and deadly virus was a hoax or not that serious? The answer is just simply way too many and it should have been taken seriously starting back in January.

I am sure my feelings are pretty clear throughout this entire post. I am ashamed of how the country I was born and raised in has behaved for the past three and a half years and honestly probably many more. It will not come as a shock to anyone, but I am not and never have been a fan of Donald Trump. I think the way he blames everyone else for what has gone wrong in the world, how he disrespects everyone that disagrees with him and the media for doing their job, the revolting names he calls others, the way he refers to other countries “shit holes”, the way he has absolutely has no respect for the country he represents or the people living there, and so much more than just repulsive. This man cares so much about his pole numbers that rapidly dwindling and of course, he is blaming the democrats, when truthfully it is his own fault.

I think y’all know I always try my best to be optimistic and believe that positive thoughts will lead to a positive outcome. I also know how incredibly negative this post might seem, but these feelings have built up for a while now. I want to apologize if anything I have written was offensive to you and hope you know that was never my intent. I am a very sensitive person so hearing about the countless people that are dying daily because of COVID-19 breaks my heart and tend to have me in tears. Of course, I do not know any of the people that lost their lives to this virus, but they meant something to someone else.

I also have never been a political person and found most if not all politicians to be dishonest. Trump and Pence have proven my views of dishonest politicians. It is hard for me to understand how anyone could know about how many people have died because of a virus and how it would not affect them. It will never make sense to me how anyone that represents a country and not care about the people. How they sleep soundly at night is a mystery to me.

Since the news first broke about Jeffrey Epstein in 2005 it has made me sick. I then read a book by one of my favorite authors, James Patterson wrote about Epstein which made my feelings even more intense. After Epstein was arrested I thought that justice had been made for his victims.

Of course, he ended up committing suicide while in prison which could be viewed as a good thing, but it was an easy and selfish way out for him and his victims did not get to testify and feel the closure they may have needed. The latest with the Epstein situation was his long-term confidant and associate a female was arrested. This woman helped find Epstein young girls to become another victim and she also participated. Any woman that is capable of doing this kind of harm to a young and innocent girl is vile and appalling and should feel shame for the ways they ruined the child’s youth.

I do realize this might have not been the most positive thing I have written, but this is how I feel. Again, I am sorry if I have offended anyone reading this and hope I did not discourage you from reading future things I write.

This post was very personal and full of raw emotions. I do appreciate you taking the time to read and I encourage you to leave a comment, which I will respond to as quickly as I can.

Y’all know I am starting my new full-time, work from home job tomorrow and I plan to continue blogging as much as I can. No matter how busy I get I will continue doing Motivational Monday, Pick Me Up Thursday and Let It Go Friday! Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, and many positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Time for HUGE changes!

Just say “NO” to racism

I am writing this with tears of sadness in my eyes and anger for the inappropriate ways some individuals have and continue being mistreated around the world. More than anything I wish I could say that racism was unheard of and wasn’t something anyone had to encounter, but unfortunately I can’t. I highly doubt anyone will ever be able to explain to me how or why in a country CLAIMING to be FREE everyone isn’t treated equally. Why does the color of an individual’s skin determine the way they are treated and viewed in our society? No one ever will be able to do this because it is completely and totally ABSURD and WRONG!

The entire world has been amid to two pandemics, but only one is discussed openly. No one can deny the COVID-19 pandemic that has been going on for several months, but what about the racism pandemic that has plagued the lives of many for centuries?

I am starting with the most recent examples, but there are so many others I will also discuss throughout this post. Police brutality has existed long before the two recent situations of police killing innocent unarmed black people. Do you truly know what police brutality means? It means using excessive and or unnecessary force by personnel affiliated with law enforcement duties when dealing with suspects and civilians.

It wasn’t but 18 days before the four police officers in Minneapolis, MN killed an unarmed innocent black man, enraging people around the country, did another police officer in Atlanta, GA kill another unarmed innocent black man. After the riots that went on for weeks, I would have thought the police force would not continue following these unacceptable behaviors and treatment of black individuals. Maybe I was just fooling myself because I couldn’t have been more wrong.

I guess it is just me being naïve and wanting to see the good in people, but also thinking police officers want to serve and protect civilians. The unfortunate and clear truth about most police officers is, they are just uneducated, arrogant, and angry bullies with a shiny gun and badge that don’t think laws apply to them and they can get away with murder. This is something that should have already ended, but needs to come to an end immediately!

There are countless numbers of innocent black individuals who were killed by a police officer over the years. Considering there are so many, I am only going to discuss eight of these innocent people that lost their lives too soon and for no valid reason.

Going back six years on July 9, 2014, an unarmed black man whose name was Charles K. Goodridge in Houston, TX was shot and killed by an off-duty officer. This off-duty officer was working as a security guard at the apartment complex Goodridge had previously lived at. Goodridge had been evicted from this complex, which the police officer/security guard was aware of. So when he saw Goodridge in a common area he went back to his apartment to retrieve his gun and handcuffs. The police officer/security guard proceeded to hunt for Goodridge ready to arrest him for trespassing, but Goodridge resisted and tried to run away but was unfortunately shot in the process. Goodridge was left untreated or even offered first aid as he lay there on the ground bleeding from the two bullet wounds that penetrated his abdomen. At one point he tried lifting his head, but the officer using his foot pushed his head back down onto the pavement. After not getting medical attention on the scene and the hour wait to arrive at the hospital, he was pronounced dead at the hospital.

It was only 8 days later on July 17, 2014, when another unarmed black man was brutalized by a police officer. Eric Garner in Staton Island, NY was accused by a police officer of selling single cigarettes without tax stamps. Garner simply denied what he was accused of and told the officer he was tired of the constant harassment. The officer did not take kindly to this and began attempting to arrest Garner. Once the officer placed his hands on Garner, he pulled his arms away. At this time the officer thought it was necessary to put his arm around Garner’s neck and continued wrestling him to the ground. Multiple other officers joined in to assist with restraining Garner, while he reiterated three words, “I can’t breathe” 11 times as he laid face down on the sidewalk. Even after Garner lost consciousness the officers kept him in a chokehold and only turned him onto his side. While they waited 7 minutes for the ambulance to arrive, not one of the officers attempted to provide first aid to Garner. One hour later, Garner was sadly pronounced dead at a local hospital, which could have been avoided if only they tried to help him when he stated he couldn’t breathe.

Less than one month later in Ferguson, MI, an unarmed 18-year-old black man, Michael Brown Jr. was shot and killed by another police officer. Brown was walking down the street with a friend, both boys were unarmed and not causing any problems. Of course, the officer-involved stated he was acting in self-defense by choosing to fire his weapon several times. Brown’s friend that was there when his friend was killed has explained they were walking away from the officer after they were told to get off the streets, which they had explained they were a few moments from their destination. Brown’s friend said the officer came back towards them in his patrol car and after a few words tried pulling Brown into the car. Brown freed himself from the officer and started running away, when the officer exited his car, shooting his gun multiple times, which ended another innocent black man’s life.

On November 22, 2014, in Cleveland, OH a 12-year-old child, Tamir Rice was shot and killed by a police officer. Rice, being a young boy was outside playing and holding his toy gun acting like he was shooting it. The officers that first saw Rice were responding to a 911 call about a man flaunting a gun at a nearby park. Moments after the two responding officers saw the boy and say they didn’t know he was a child, but thought he was the man that was called into 911, one of the officers didn’t waste any time and fired two shots, one of which killed this little boy. Most young boys play with toy guns and aren’t aware of how some may view this as a threat. In my eyes, this was a heinous act that could have and should have been avoided. Sadly, Tamir Rice’s parents lost their child, and the officer that fired the fatal shot was not charged with criminal charges as he should have been.

On the morning of April 4, 2015, in North Charleston, SC, another unarmed black man was shot and killed by a police officer. Walter L. Scott was on his way to an auto parts store when he was pulled over for a non-functioning brake light. After the officer involved had finished talking with Scott and was going back to his patrol car, Scott exited the vehicle and started running away. It was at this time the officer began his chase on foot. Scott and the officer became involved in a physical altercation when the officer managed to fire his Taser, which did hit Scott, but he continued to try running away again. A few moments later the officer drew his handgun, firing eight rounds at Scott from behind. Scott was struck 5 times, 3 in his back, once in the upper buttocks, and once in the ear. This sounds like a perfect example of excessive force to me, what do you think?

Another incident that occurred recently was shortly before midnight on March 13, 2020, in Louisville, KY. Police claiming they knocked several times and announced themselves as they entered the apartment of a young black woman, Breonna Taylor to serve a “no-knock” search warrant regarding a tip they received regarding drug activity. When the police busted down the door, Taylor’s boyfriend thought the apartment had been broken into and went for his licensed firearm. Her boyfriend feared for both of their lives and was acting in self-defense when he fired the first shot that hit one of the officers involved in the leg. The officers then responded with their open fire of more than 20 rounds, which hit objects throughout the entire apartment, including Taylor at least 8 times. Taylor was sadly pronounced dead at the scene. Neighbors of Taylor spoke out saying they never heard the officers knock or announce themselves and they were also in fear. In this situation, not only did the officers NOT announce who they were, but they also killed another innocent black person and their reason for the search had no validity because there were no drugs found in the apartment.

I want to thank y’all for visiting my site today. I am sure it is obvious how upset I am about this entire situation. I spent most of my life blind to these issues of police brutality and now want to do more or at least something to end this! I am very aware the people I mentioned in this post are only a few and there are many others that experienced police brutality and sadly lost their lives.There comes a time when change is a necessary thing and it takes many people demanding these changes for something to actually get done. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, and many positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Ways to not allow the past to destroy the future!

One thing we all undoubtedly have in common is we all have a past. There could be parts that make us feel stronger, happier, and more thankful. Other parts of our past may make us feel sadness, pain, and regret. Regardless of any emotions felt from the past it is important we continue moving forward with our lives and not allow for the past to devastate any part of the happy future we all deserve.

Do you have any past experiences or memories that still haunt you to this day? Are there any past experiences, good or bad, that shaped the way you view the world today?

Many people do not truly understand how much negative experiences affect them. Those that had an unfair and difficult childhood to being involved in a violent and abusive relationship to being hurt in other ways can leave scars on the mind and emotional well-being throughout one’s life if the problems are not addressed.

I am going to share some tips that I hope will be beneficial and lead you towards a happier and healthier life and way from allowing anything to contaminate your happy and bright future.

1. For reasons that are unknown to me, traumatic experiences are often disregarded as being a source of negative changes. Anyone that has dealt with a traumatic experience and recognized it could understand having some negative changes. I guess the big difference is some people that went through a traumatic experience never recognized it as such and how it negatively impacted them.

There are numerous opinions and definitions regarding trauma, but they do mainly focus on experiences threatening the sanity, bodily morals, or life. These experiences can include child abuse, abandonment, loss of a loved one, car accidents, having been a victim of a crime, abuse of any kind, near-death experience, being a witness of something horrendous, and so much more.Considering we are different we will all respond differently to traumatic experiences. Some people might lean on various substances to handle the issues and others may cope in less noticeable ways. Coping mechanisms are not always healthy, but hopefully, they will only be utilized for the short-term.

2. Trust is a very delicate and intricate topic. Trust involves having a certain level of vulnerableness to the person we desire to trust. It can become challenging when someone from the past has violated the trust we have instilled in them. Anytime we are hurt, it is our human nature to want to put up walls to protect ourselves from any further harm. Once we have experienced the hurt from someone that broke our trust, it can be hard to let another person in because we want to have control over what happens to us in our life.

The biggest problem with trust is it does require us to be vulnerable. No matter how much we read about who we should avoid or how to detect liars and manipulators it typically ends up being through attempting educated guesses and believing in our intuition.

3. Regret can cheat us from happiness if we remain focused on past errors made or wishing things were done differently. Regrets can also be with situations when everything was done correctly, but things still did not work out. In these scenarios, it will be best to think slightly differently. There does come a point we need to make decisions that stop allowing regret to control us and we start enjoying life in the present, but also work towards a greater future.

4. The only thing a history of past failures does is nourish depression and low self-esteem. It is only those that are very fortunate and try something new without any problems their first time. The vast majority of people, who succeed with attempting something, will fail, but use their new knowledge and try again.

5. Unfortunately, there doesn’t seem to be many places we can go and not come across anger, justified or not. The complication with anger is it can be toxic damaging all the positive things in life

Anger builds walls and boundaries that can become inconceivable to conquer because we are consumed with the way we are feeling. When people are angry they care far less about listening for a solution and more about having their feelings heard and validated.

We are not able to hold onto anger endlessly because it will gradually destroy our mental and emotional well-being. There does come a point we need to learn anger is counterproductive. It can work as a spark, but anger alone isn’t able to do the work needed to make a change.

Thank you for visiting my site today. I do always appreciate your continued support and truly enjoy reading your comments. I will never make comments mandatory, but I do encourage them because your thoughts are meaningful and I think beneficial to everyone reading. I hope your week has started off well and you are continuing to remain safe with this virus looming over us all. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, and many positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

The Bright Side of Negative Feelings

We have all heard that there is power in positive thinking, which I have always believed to be true. Even though we need to try finding the positive aspects of most situations we encounter in life, sometimes is still can be nearly impossible to not recognize and acknowledge our negative feelings. Do you think it is possible to maintain a positive mindset most of the time, but that it also isn’t healthy to ignore our negative feelings?

In this post I am going to share with you some critical reasons why we should not ignore our negative feelings when they appear, but instead embrace them.

1. Negative feelings can be viewed as a powerful warning method-

What does our fear do for us? Fear warns us of imminent danger and urges us to take action. Our negative feelings basically do the same and are acting as an alarm that signals possible harm in some form. This hard could be physical, emotional, or mental depending on what is going on in life.

We all pay attention when we feel fear, so why shouldn’t we embrace negative feelings? We should ask ourselves the question, why we are experiencing these negative emotions? Is there something we should be avoiding? Does this mean we should be taking another path in life?

2. Negative feelings are trying to tell us that something is NOT right-

I have just explained how our negative feelings notify us of possible danger, but they also can be warning that something in our life isn’t right. Maybe it is something in our relationship, our career, or something with our health, or even something we continue to put off has issues that we need to address. Often we should not view our negative feelings as merely a nuisance, but more as a good friend that has our best interests in mind.

3. Negative emotions can encourage us to take beneficial actions-

Unfortunately, we have all received bad news that caused us sadness. When this happens, what is the first thing we do? It is human nature to feel down and even feel sorry for ourselves. Instead of ignoring these negative feelings, it might be better to embrace them. Acknowledge the feelings we are experiencing and allow them to help us find a logical solution.

We should not deny or apologize for our negative emotions. Nor should we allow these negative emotions to paralyze us or overwhelm us. We are allowed to feel what we feel, whenever we feel what we feel and never dismiss those emotions. We are feeling how we feel for a reason and maybe we should explore them.

4. Negative feelings allow us to welcome and appreciate the good life has to offer-

How would you feel if everything in life went the same and was predictable? If every moment of our life was always happy and content, there would not be any negative feelings that would make the positive feelings more appreciated when they occur. All of us need to understand that no matter how much pain and distress we may deal with, life will also provide us with happiness and comfort.

5. Negative feelings provide us confirmation of what is important-

A well-founded signal you have come into your core values is when you have negative feelings. Maybe you violated one of your values or you failed to follow through with a promise and you are feeling guilty for this. Negative feelings are commonly a crucial assertion that we are honoring our beliefs, values, and views.

6. Negative feelings invite us to contemplate-

Allowing ourselves to have negative feelings allows us the opportunity to think deeply about things we did not give adequate time to previously. It is possible, we need to consider our health practices or spending habits or maybe something we have continued putting off for a long period, but are all things that need to be dealt with. Embracing and acknowledging our negative feelings may not be easy, but they are needed for our mental, physical, and emotional health.

7. Negative feelings can help protect us when we feel overburden-

Many of us tend to overdo things and push ourselves beyond the limits we are aware of. When we do over extend ourselves, we will hopefully begin feeling negative feelings such as frustration and irritability. These feelings are our body’s way to telling us to start facing ourselves and start limiting the amount of additional commitments we take on. We must listen to our inner voice and pay attention to the warnings our negative feelings are trying to notify us of.

8. Negative feelings offer healing-

We do not need to have thick skin or be referred to as overly sensitive; we just need to take time to heal when someone else causes us pain. If another person does or says something hurtful, it is very common to have negative feelings regarding the situation. Denying our feelings, no matter how negative they maybe will not speed up our healing process. This means it might be beneficial to use those negative feelings to promote our healing and take the time needed to do so without rushing ourselves.

9. Negative feelings will not allow a denial of reality-

It is important we know and understand that denying our feelings will not be a successful way to get over our negative feelings. Pretending something doesn’t bother us will never make that lie be the truth and could end up causing more issues and pain for the future. When something or someone causes us pain, it is perfectly fine to grieve the loss and disappointment. The only true way to get over disappointment and or hurt is the face the problem, mend the wounds, and move on with the life you deserve.

I hope the information in this post was beneficial for you, especially if you are going through a difficult time. It is never easy to face what has caused us pain, but we will be better off in the long run if we do so. I am sure there are several other ways that would be helpful and would love to read any comments you may have. The entire world is dealing with hard times right now and we all need to help and support one another. Until times get a little easier being kind, compassionate, and empathetic to what others are dealing is extremely important. I also wanted to say, please do not take this post as a negative, but to just say it is okay to have negative feelings because we are only human!

Thank you so much for visiting my site today. I hope you had a lovely week and you will enjoy a safe and happy weekend! Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, and many positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Open letter to the president, vice president & other leaders

open letterThis post is my open letter to the current president, vice president, and other leaders. I am sorry in advance if what I have stated creates any ill feelings, but this is the way I feel about things.

To the president, vice president, and others in power,

While the world has been under attack from a deadly virus, shouldn’t you be protecting and defending the country and people you represent? Are you unable to see the damage you are doing daily? You were made aware of the virus that has caused extensive turmoil long before you bothered to act on it. We have all been terrified of this virus and those, like myself with a compromised immune system have lived in fear for months. 

How long did you say COVID-19 was a democratic hoax or not all that serious? You tried blaming everyone but the person you have to see in the mirror every day. Do you think if you acted like a president, a real leader sooner, lives could have been saved? Instead of thinking of your presidential duties as a TV show, you should be thinking of the lives you have endangered. Instead of leaning on Twitter and calling journalist fake news, you should be behaving in a much more mature manner instead of the childish ways you are.

Three and a half years into you being the president of the United States, you still feel threatened by our previous president. You are even trying to blame your failures on him and why? Obama was not perfect, but he did care more about American lives that you ever have.

I am not saying things would have been drastically different if only you acted on the information you were provided because we will never know now. It is obvious you somehow have supporters and those people listen and believe your lies. Too many followed your idea about ingesting disinfectants, which cause chaos. The people that believe what comes out of your mouth isn’t necessarily your fault, they are just ignorant and unable to think for themselves.

What I would like to ask of you is to please start thinking about the millions of people you represent. Start putting our needs above your egotistical mindset. You are currently the president of the most powerful country in the world, so start acting like it. Yes, COVID-19 did begin in China and yet the numbers of cases and deaths in the United States are higher than any other country in the world because of you. We are not able to go back in time to repair the numerous disturbances and lives destroyed because of your inability to act as you care about anyone besides yourself. You can start today treating people like they matter. You can start to have respect for journalists that are just doing their job. You can start being a president!

Thank you for visiting my site today and reading my extremely frustrated letter to thosewe are in this together in power. Again, I am sorry if anything I wrote offended you. Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs and if you do feel the president is doing well for the people and country that is your choice and I can respect that. I only hope you can respect my feelings and thoughts on how much damage has happened to the country and how many lives were impacted by things not be handled immediately. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love ❤, comfort, and many positive vibes!

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❤Always, Alyssa❤

Let It Go Friday

downloadHappy Friday y’all! I hope you had a safe and lovely week. In life it does not matter who you are, what you do for a living or anything else for that matter, we all face difficult times in life. Some of the difficult times will cause us stress, pain, frustration or all three at the same time. I have already mentioned that the past few weeks have been difficult and emotionally draining. I made the decision yesterday to not wait for Let It Go Friday and to step away from the issues immediately. The situation causing me emotional distress really had little to do with me and everything to do with a couple people I care about and one that I do not think I could care any less for!

How was your week? Y’all know I think Friday is the perfect day to let go of anything 4DAz3790upsetting and begin the weekend with a clear and happy mind! I hope the quote I am sharing with y’all will help you to let go of any negative emotions. Clearing our minds from negativity is beneficial for our physical and emotional health!

Congratulations, we made it through another week. Some of us still have “stay at home” orders 92566032_148356680050649_3264718566094956429_nin place, which I think is good because no one is safe from COVID-19 yet. I do watch the numbers daily in the state I live in. The crazy thing is we do have days when new cases of COVID-19 are in the single digits, but then the cases increase with double digits that next few days. For example Tuesday and Wednesday there were 7 or 8 new cases, but then the jump on Thursday was 32. It is painfully clear that too many people have a false sense of security and many do not understand wearing a mask and social 92101563_1597447863745824_3525203181490511669_ndistancing is the best plan to always follow. I was at a gas station the other day picking something up for my husband and not just one person, but two people got way too close to me. When anyone gets closer than 6 feet to me I step back and give a dirty look, which does not make them realize why/ It takes a lot of self control to not say to ignorant people, “Step back at least 6 feet or I will be forced to spray you with an insane amount of pepper spray!”

Thank you for visiting my site today. I hope the Let It Go Friday Butterflyquote shared will help you to let go of any anger or frustration and you can start the weekend with a clear mind. I hope you have a wonderful weekend and you will continue to follow the social distancing guidelines. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love ❤, comfort, and many positive vibes!

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❤Always, Alyssa❤

April is Child Abuse Awareness Month

childabuse-prevention-monthApril is child abuse awareness month and it is extremely important to spread this message to as many people as possible. Child abuse is when a parent or caregiver either by action or lack of action causes injury to a child. This is an awful and widespread situation causing inexcusable physical and emotional pain to innocent children. Sadly, each year there are more than three million cases of either physical, emotional, sexual, or neglect in the United States. The following information will describe each type of abuse and the signs to each.

Physical abuse is when a parent or caregiver inflicts non-accidental physical injuries to aunnamed (2) child. Approximately, 28.3% of adults have disclosed being physically abused as a child. Physical abuse can involve striking, kicking, burning, choking, throwing, shoving, and any other activity that can injure a child. Unfortunately, the outcomes of physical abuse can be any of the following:

  • Internal injuries that can result in brain damage
  • Broken bones, sprains, and dislocated joints
  • Emotional and psychological harm

images (8)The majority of people abusing a child do not realize some of their actions and mannerisms show there has been abuse in the home. The following are signs of abuse the parent or caregiver can display:

  • Unable to explain a child’s injury or attempt explaining the injury, but it doesn’t make any sense
  • Exhibits aggression towards a child or becomes extremely anxious about a child’s behavior
  • Tries saying the child isn’t trustworthy and lies
  • Hinders or prevents the medical care of a child

There are many signs of physical abuse a child may without knowing is showing. It is important to be aware and pay close attention to the following possible signs:

  • Visible and severe injuries
  • Injuries are at different stages of healing
  • Child is not able to explain injuries in a way that is clear and makes sense
  • Frequency of timing and history of injuriesimages (6)
  • Bruises have distinctive shapes

When a child is being abused it is very common for the child to have some behavioral changes. Most often the child does not understand what and why this is happening to them and can become angry causing them to behave in uncommon ways, which can include any of the following issues:

  • Aggression towards peers, pets, or other animals
  • Displays the fear of parents or other adults
  • Wears long sleeve shirts, no matter the season
  • Develops feelings of fear, depression, and anxiety
  • Experiences nightmares and or insomnia
  • Self-destructive behaviors or attitudes
  • Acting immaturely, emotional and extreme behaviors

images (7)A child is being sexually abused when an adult has sexual intentions or the child or involves the child in sexual acts.  Sexual abuse can also be when an older or stronger child uses a younger or less strong child for excitement or sexual gratification. About 20.7% of adults have reported they were sexually abused when they were a child.

Before we go too deep into sexual abuse, I want to forewarn you this part was extremely difficult to write, so it may also be troubling to read. I am fairly sure, especially with the present company, I am not the only one that finds sexual abuse both degrading and appalling. If only this topic wasn’t grotesque enough, it gets much worse because of all the different types of sexual abuse, which includes the following:

  1. Non-contact abuse– happens when a child is abused without being touched, This downloadcan occur both in-person and online, which includes
  • Exposing or flashing
  • Showing child pornographic videos
  • Improper sexual talking
  • Pressure child to make, view or share child abuse images or videos
  • Force the child to masturbate
  • Threaten and coercions child to take part in sexual activities via phone or online
  1. Contact Abuse is when the abuser makes physical contact with the child victim and can include:

POSSIBLE+PHYSICAL+SIGNS+OF+SEXUAL+ABUSE– Sexual touching to any part of the child’s body, with or without clothing

– Uses part of a child’s body or another object to rape or penetrate a child

– Child pressured and forced to take part in sexual acts

– Forcing a child to undress and or touch someone else

Parents and caregivers typically have no idea how their behavior can display signs of sexual abuse. By being aware and paying attention, signs you might be able to view are the following:images (2)

  • Parent or caregiver neglects to look after a child
  • Unstable adult presence
  • Parent is jealous and possessive
  • Sexual relationships are problematic, unhealthy and dysfunctional
  • Parent depends heavily on a child for emotional support

When a child is or has been sexually abused there are many signs that should be noted. Again, the signs I am listing are unspeakably odious, but they do include the following:

  • Struggles sitting, walking and with bowel problems
  • Torn, stained, bloody undergarments
  • Bleeding, bruising, painful, swollen, itchiness of the genital area
  • Reoccurring urinary tract infections or yeast infections

sexual-abuse-749x1024Sexual abuse is an awful situation for anyone to go through, but children are innocent and do not understand what is happening. The child was likely told by the abuser not to tell anyone because no one would believe them and even threaten them to not say anything.  A child might be scared and angry making behavioral changes to be relatively common. Below are some behavioral changes that may be noticed:

  • Child does not want to changes clothes, especially during gym class
  • Withdrawn, depressed and anxiousness
  • Aggressive, poor relationships with peers
  • Negative self-image
  • Lacks confidence and self-care
  • Performance in school declines
  • Substance abuse, recklessness, suicide attempts
  • Sleep disturbances, such as nightmares, fear bedtime and bedwetting
  • Acting out sexually at a young ageimages (5)

Child abuse can leave behind more than bruises from physical abuse and or the inexcusable effects of sexual abuse. Emotional abuse can cause many other scars not visible to the naked eye. Emotional abuse is commonly called psychological abuse because it involves persistent emotional mistreatment of a child causing irreparable damage over time. Approximately 10.6% of adults reported they were emotionally abused as a child.

Emotional abuse is not always easy to detect because it is normally part of other forms of abuse. The issues that are involved with emotional abuse may include:

*Rejecting or ignoring- examples include showing lack of interest in a child, no initiating child-abuse-physical-emotional-sexual-9-638or returning the affection

*Shaming or humiliating- Example include name-calling, mocking, belittling

*Terrorizing- Examples include blaming, accusing, threatening, manipulating, screaming or yelling at the child

*Corrupting- Examples include encouraging bad behavior, pressuring a child into a criminal act

Whether the emotional abuse is being imposed on a child by a parent or caregiver, there are helpful signs to be aware of. I am not including all the signs because there is already a lot for you to read. Below are the signs a parent or caregiver may show:images (10)

  • Plays favorites between siblings
  • Atrocious anger management or emotional self-regulation
  • Terrible relationships with other adults
  • History of violence or abuse
  • Untreated mental illness, alcoholism or substance abuse

When a child is being emotionally abused they could display physical and behavioral images (9)signs. The physical signs may include the following:

  • Developmental delays
  • Speech disorder
  • Health issues such as ulcers and skin disorder
  • Weight problems

Examples of a child’s behavior change are as followed:

  • Learning disabilities and developmental delays
  • Excessively complaint or defensive
  • Intense emotions, aggression, anxieties
  • Destructive or anti-social behaviors
  • Inappropriate behavior (either too childlike or too adult-like)

Child neglect is a form of abuse where the parent or caregiver does not offer the care, supervision, affection, or care necessary for a child’s health, safety, and well-being. This can include physical, emotional, medical, and educational neglect. Child neglect signs are as follows:

  • Deserting a childneglect
  • Continuing to leave a child in another’s care for hours, days, weeks at a time
  • Not providing food and drink, or clothing appropriate to the weather
  • Failing to supervise child for valid safety concerns
  • Allowing a child to be around an inappropriate caregiver
  • Exposing a child to an unsafe or unsanitary environment

Although some states that will not prosecute parents because of religious reasons, the parent can still receive a court order to protect a child’s life. Parents and caregivers are 2ee34a5f1acb222e256a76f8f088f420required to get a child-appropriate medical treatment for injuries and illness. Basic preventative care to ensure children remains safe and healthy is necessary.

Examples of medical negligence include, but not limited to the following:

  • Not taking a child to the hospital or medical professional for serious illness or injury
  • Withholding child from getting treatment
  • Failing to provide preventative medical and dental care for a child
  • Refusing to follow medical recommendations for child

Unfortunately, only one instance of neglect can cause lifelong distress to a child. Neglect tends to require a pattern of behavior over some time. Some signs suggesting a parent or caregiver needs assistance with nurturing and how to protect a child while they are in your care, which includes:unnamed (3)

  • Shows indifference or lack of concern for a child
  • Depression, drug and alcohol abuse or a mental health issue
  • Perceives child negativity
  • Expects a child to take care of themselves

 A child being neglected may show any of the following signs:

  • Clothing does not fit, clothes are dirt and not weather appropriate
  • Often hungry seeks out where the food is, shows signs of malnutrition
  • Low body weight
  • Often overtired and falling asleep during the school day
  • Hygiene problems
  • Untreated medical and dental issues and or incomplete immunizations
  • Frequent changes to schools and or physician

General_Facebook_f1Any form of abuse leaves traumatic memories that can’t be erased. The scars left behind may be a visible daily reminder and the deep-rooted emotional effects throughout life can and do damage a child’s sense of self-esteem. Current and future relationships can be impacted and the ability to function at home and school can be challenging. Effects from child abuse may include the following:

  1. An inability to trust and relationships can be a struggle. The ones a child should be able to trust, a parent or caregiver, so if it is one of these people abusing the child, it is understandable why the child will find trusting almost impossible.
  2. Deep feelings of worthlessness. When a child hears repeatedly negative words used to describe who they are, it becomes extremely difficult to overcome. As abused children grow up, they may neglect their education and settle for jobs with low pay because it is all they feel they are worth. Sexually abused children feel shame images (4)surrounding the abuse and battle with feelings of being damaged, which may allow people in their lives that have bad habits and intentions.
  3. Struggle with balancing emotions. Abused children do not feel safe expressing their emotions. This can result in burying emotions deep down so the emotions can be ignored. Adults that were abused struggle with anxiety, depression, and anger they can’t explain. Often adults that were abused will lean on alcohol and drugs to numb the painful memories.

If a child feels comfortable enough with you to explain what they have experienced, pay very close attention to the child and be compassionate. Of course, it will never be easy to hear about a child being abused, so there are some crucial things to remember and 7686078_0follow:

  1. Avoid reactions of denial and remain calm. If a child senses shock or disgust at what they are telling you, the child will become fearful to continue their story and shut down completely.
  2. Do not interrogate. It is very important to allow the child to explain what they experienced in their own words. If you ask the child leading questions they may get confused and flustered making it difficult to finish their story. The child has shown already they trust you, so trust them to continue.
  3. Reassure the child they did nothing wrong. Explain to the child it took a lot of courage to be willing to share their story with you. It may help the child if you thank them for trusting you and that you are there to help them.
  4. Safety needs to come first. If you feel you or the child is in danger, especially if you child-abuse-survivorsintervene further, leave any more intervention to the professionals.

First, I want to thank you for visiting my site today. Second, I know this information can be very disturbing, I mean it took me several days to complete allowing myself breaks from this painful topic. I think it is important to be aware of what can happen to children and also have ways to offer children comfort. I would love to read any fposter,small,wall_texture,product,750x1000.u2comments you have about the information I have provided.

I hope you are having a good week so far and staying safe! I know someday the new cases of coronavirus will level out and the fatalities will end. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love ❤, comfort, and many positive vibes!

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❤Always, Alyssa❤

Anger is an awful feeling

Anger-Umbrella-Listening-for-Feelings-e1356246263507-2328x1164In my opinion, anger is one of the worst emotions to experience. Anger is an intense emotional state that involves a strong uncomfortable and hostile response to a perceived provocation, hurt, or threat. Despite what some people may think, no one is perfect. We all have certain triggers that create massive amounts of anger within us, some more than others of course. Regardless of the intensity, the trigger may be, anger is a very unpleasant and useless emotion. Allowing anger to control our lives, instead of us dominating the feelings of anger is not healthy.

There are things we can do to help us gain some control of the situation and attempt to anger+6rectify the problem. Instead of throwing a toddler-like temper tantrum, which seldom gets any positive results, venting about your feelings could eliminate some of the harsh emotions before they get out of hand.

There are many anger management tips you might benefit from during a time you are feeling an intense amount of anger.

  1. Concentrate and focus on taking deep breaths. Slowly inhale and count to 4, then slowly exhale while counting to 8. Continue this exercise 4-5 more times, inhale slowly count to 4 the exhale slowly count to 8. This gets our mind off the reasons you were angry and combats your body’s tension, which will help you calm down.
  2. Acknowledge your anger as a short-lived emotion. Even though while in the moment it seems like the feeling will not ever end, try to remind yourself that it will end in a matter of time.TCA-2
  3. Get yourself out of the situation you are in. A slight change in scenery and walking away from the person causing your anger will allow you to clear your mind and calm down.
  4. Express yourself in any way you can! Allowing feelings to be bottled up is not healthy and could cause more problems in the long run. You can call a friend, partner, family member or anyone else you feel comfortable confiding in. Talking about problems is the best way to put things in perspective and help you figure out what you are truly angry about in the first place.
  5. Music can have a powerful effect on the mind and soul. You may have a few songs that never fail to calm you down when your emotions are on high alert and even make you smile again. I have several songs that can always make me happy and actually relaxed. Do you have any songs or bands that help your mind calm down?
  6. Dance around the room to a song that you can draw energy from. Not everyone is a good dance, but you do not have to be. It is just moving around and staying active that can release negative energy caused by anger. If you absolutely hate the idea of dancing around the room, it is okay any exercise can alleviate feelings of anger.
  7. Focus your mind on counting backward from 100. This very simple task can keep your mind occupied for 2 minutes or so. Just think, by silently counting for a couple of minutes, you can enjoy some peace and quiet!
  8. Close your eyes for a moment and imagine your happy place. No matter where your happy place is, having that image in your mind can calm you down drastically! My anger-management-strategies-4178870-478b9bc1a2b648a7b4bcbe7934591cf5happy place is the beach, so whenever I am feeling angry or frustrated, I picture myself at the beach listening to the sounds of the waves crashing down and the smell of saltwater in the air. Sometimes, it almost feels like I am there in the present.
  9. Consider your language and understand that some words that flood your mind are not at all helpful. Terms like always and never can be defeated words that will not allow for positive outcomes. When we are angry we tend to think nothing will ever go our way and life isn’t going to get better. We might be having a day when our pain is higher and we say to ourselves the pain is never going away and it will always be here. I have had those days and thoughts, but that did not help me feel better. Subconsciously, thoughts like these we are convincing ourselves the situation is worse than it really is.

Anger can produce various emotions and can potentially cause us to act in irrational imagesways. In the heat of the moment, it seems like an easier and better idea to act without logic; however when we act in an unreasonable manner it only creates more issues for the long-term.

While we are dealing with angry feelings there are some we should try out best to avoid. One of the worst ways we can respond to feelings of angry is by saying and doing nothing. If we try avoiding those feelings they will only continue to grow stronger because they are left to simmer in our minds. Some people think that going for a drive to clear your mind and calm their emotions is a good thing. No matter how great a driver you might be, driving angry can reduce your concentration, making getting behind the wheel hazardous. It surprises me that some 1people have the ability to go to sleep angry. It is very common that the person going to sleep angry will not get good quality sleep and therefore will be sleep deprived the following day. Sleep deprivation is only going to add to the feelings of anger and frustration. Another awful thing to do when angry is to keep the argument going. Nothing good will come from this situation and there comes a point when a break is needed to calm down! Adding alcohol to a situation with anger involved will only add fuel to the already heated fire! Basically, it is best to avoid alcohol until the situation has been handled and a resolution has been found. It is best to NEVER make any huge decisions while emotions are on high alert. Sometimes we need to place things on hold and make any decision when things are back on track because somethings will be hard if not impossible to correct.images

Thank y’all for visiting my site today. I hope the information in this post was helpful and would love to hear from you. How do you handle feelings when you are angry? I absolutely hate confrontation, so when I get upset enough to deal with this problem it is huge. I follow the rule of choose your battles! I tend to find most things people like to argue about not worth the time or stress. When something is important enough for me to engage in an argument, it just got to the point the situation needed to be handled. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love ❤, comfort, and many positive vibes!

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❤Always, Alyssa❤