Protect the safety of children

A couple of days ago I heard about a disturbing story on the news. This was a story about a former UFC fighter, Cain Velasquez in California. Cain learned that a repulsive man had molested one of his young relatives 100 times at this child’s daycare, which was owned by this person’s mother. The man that “allegedly” molested Cain’s young relative was released from custody and against the DA’s order without bail, only being forced to wear an electronic monitoring bracelet and remain 100 yards from children under the age of 14. He claims he was on his way to get his electronic monitoring bracelet when Cain found him.

Consumed with nothing but rage, Cain engaged in a high-speed chase following the person that “allegedly” molested his young relative and shot a handgun into the vehicle. Two of Cain’s shots hit two individuals that were in the vehicle, none of which were life-threatening or the man who allegedly molested his young relative.

Unfortunately, shortly after the incident took place, Cain was arrested during a traffic stop. He is being charged with attempted murder, shooting at an occupied motor vehicle, three counts of assault with a firm arm, three counts of assault with a deadly weapon, willfully discharging a firearm from a vehicle and carrying a loaded firearm with intent to commit a felony.

What do you think about this story? I do not think people understand the lifelong effects molestation causes. Of course, children are resilient and mostly do not understand what happened to them, but this type of abuse will live within them their entire life. Children are innocent and trust people they know and sadly it is the people the children know that may take advantage of them. The story I have discussed briefly shows the children knew who their abuser was, but at least they were able to confide in someone and get the help they needed.

I am going to be honest with y’all, I do not think Cain did anything wrong and should not be in prison. Any deplorable man that thinks putting their hands on a child is normal needs to be shown their ways are VERY wrong and should be punished! No man or woman should get away with harming an innocent child and I almost do not think prison is good enough for them. I understand some of you reading this will disagree with me and think that Cain is where he should be because we are all entitled to our opinion.

I think I have shown how I feel about this topic and honestly think we should all do what we can to protect children. This subject does hit a nerve with me and enrages me more than anything else ever could. I know I have voiced my opinions about politics and the vaccine, but the two of those combined will not come close to causing my blood to boil as much. I remember working in a children’s hospital years ago and have seen children that were victims of abuse. Abuse of any kind stays with a person and can haunt them for the rest of their lives.

Thank you for visiting my site today. I know this post is different from ones I have done before, but when I saw this story, it caused me to feel something deep within my soul and I could not even write about it immediately. I do want the chance to read your thoughts on this and I will respond as soon as I can. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Toxicity in families

Family can be a sensitive topic to talk about because there tend to be various types of feelings. Families either are happy and get along well or there are vast levels of drama and ill will. The truth is we do not get to choose our family because it is something we are born into, but the same blood that runs through our veins does not mean we must endure the toxicity that can come along with it. Toxic relationships cause stress and unpleasant feelings, so when life is short, we do have the right to decide when to free ourselves from venomous people.

The reason I am writing about this today is that I decided a long time ago to not associate with my mother’s side of the family. Even as a young child I could see their actions to be deceitful and malicious. I wanted no part of their destructive behavior and know I am a better person because I cut ties with them years ago. I feel that if they had been part of my life all these years, I might not be the happy, kind, loyal, loving, compassionate, caring, and honest person I am today because they are the polar opposite of who I am and who I want to be.

Recently, my mother’s younger sister went to her house for a visit. Despite me saying it was an awful idea because they have always had a toxic relationship and I did not think it would go well. Unfortunately, this is a time I wish I was wrong because the visit went terribly and caused many hurtful feelings. I do not have siblings, but from what I understand siblings should have a bond that was built in their childhood which they clearly never had.

Something people often forget is, hurtful words cannot be erased or forgotten. I have always said although physical bruises can heal, verbal wounds do not heal and can hurt for years. It is important to value yourself enough to never allow another person to attack you verbally or physically because you are worth more than that. Most of the time those that say vicious things are unhappy with their life. We have all heard that saying, “misery loves company” and we need to not welcome their company into our lives.

I do understand that family is important, but no one needs to deal with listening to ugly words from family. Maybe it would be better to say we need to understand how to maintain boundaries with others. We know what we are willing to endure and what we will refuse to deal with. When we do set boundaries, we must never change them to make someone else happy because these boundaries were set for our happiness and mental health.

Thank you for taking the time to visit my site and read what I have shared. I hope what I have written helps you if you are dealing with toxic a family member or other relationships. We all need to learn to value our self-worth and love ourselves before anyone else can truly love us. I do look forward to reading your comments and will respond as quickly as I can. Please never forget that I am always sending you LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Feeling Pessimistic

Happy Friday y’all! How has your week been? Do you have any plans for the weekend? I had planned to start a new job on March 14th but learned yesterday I will have to wait until March 21st. I am not going to lie, I was a little disappointed because I have been unemployed since being laid off on December 9th and miss working. WOW, those are words I never thought I would say, but I do enjoy working and having an income. This disappointment kind of falls in line with how life has been lately, but I will explain why I say that shortly.

Anyone that knows me would say that I am not an angry person, but the way things have been in the past few years has made me angry and frustrated. I hate the way things are in the country I live in and the world we all live in. My anger stems from the incredible amount of hate that has ravished the world and I do not understand why it has become so awful. I cannot understand why people have become so selfish and evil. Even though I have become angrier and more frustrated than I have ever wanted to be, I am still kind and empathetic to other’s struggles. I guess you could say it is a blessing and a curse, but it is something I have no control over.

The heinous issues going on in Ukraine are terrible and heartbreaking. Previously, I worked with two sweet ladies that were from Ukraine. I cannot imagine how they must be feeling worrying about their families. A neighboring country should NEVER torment its neighboring country just because one country wants to control the other. Two countries that share a border, should want to work together, and help one another, NOT destroy the other.

Last week, my husband and I went on our last snowboard trip for the season. Unfortunately, it was not the best trip we have ever been on because anything that could go wrong, did go wrong. The trip started terribly before we made it even an hour from our home. There was a point, I was ready to turn the truck around and head home because things were that unpleasant. I knew it was the last trip of the season, so we went on to the mountains. After a few days, of being in the mountains, my mood had become so negative I was ready to be home. The state we were in do not think the vaccine is a good idea or needed and I ended up getting into a heated debate with someone about it. I guess no matter how nice you are to someone and how logical you are, you cannot change people.

Another reason for my frustration and anger is that my pain levels have been incredibly high. Between the back and leg pain, and neuropathy issues it is hard to move around comfortably. Thankfully, I do not enjoy snowboarding as much as my husband does because the neuropathy issues made it almost impossible. The cold weather always increases my pain, so between stress and cold, I have been in excruciating pain for days. I cannot think of anyone who was dealing with the pain I have been would be overly optimistic.

The truth is that the reasons for my anger cannot be changed until the world changes. I do not enjoy being an angry person and I am trying to see the bright side, but it is getting harder. Always trying to see the good in people is a good thing but can also be painful and challenging for the mind. Even though I have been on the wrong side many times and people have betrayed my trust, I will continue to try to see the good in people. Yes, sometimes are easier than others, but there are still those few and far between times the good we see is beneficial and helps me to be the bigger person.

Thank you for visiting my site today. I know this post was not very positive, but unfortunately, the way I feel is not positive currently. I know things will get better and my mood will change for the better. I do hope your week was great and you have a safe weekend. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Is a perfect world possible?

What would it mean to have peace in our world and is this something that could be possible? Should it be so difficult to have everyone be happy, free, fair, equal, and forgiving? Unfortunately, for centuries this does not seem to have been the case. Through war, people have tried to gain more control and the desire to force everyone to think the same way. War does not do anything but get too many people killed. Attempts to overthrow other countries, killing and destroying the lives of innocent people is complete nonsense in my eyes. 

The amount of hate that erupts between people due to differences that cannot be changed is not solving any issues and only creates more problems. Why should anyone be allowed to judge someone based on the color of their skin, race, national origin, sexual preference, religious and or political following? Who can say the way another person is living, is not the right way to live? I strongly believe if we were all the same, the world would be an incredibly boring place to live. The past several years has shined new light on the way people think because it was made to seem normal and acceptable. These behaviors only spark hate and violence. Why are so many people unable to think for themselves and simply follow others like they are sheep? Why are so many unable to love and treat others with respect? It is 2022 and we all need to start evolving and being much better than we have been.

Do we even understand what peace means? I almost doubt it anymore because it is not something we have seen much of or seen at all. Peace is societal friendship and harmony, in the absence of hostility and violence. There is NO conflict or fear from impending war. We are all human, but no one is perfect so we SHOULD be able to get along. We may not have a lot in common, but we do all have a beating heart and feelings.

If you were able to make changes to the world for the better, what would your perfect world look like? What changes would you to accomplish this? Even though there is no such thing as perfect, changes could be put in place to make the entire world happier.

One MAJOR issue is corrupt politicians need to be replaced and bring in honest people that care about the safety and happiness of the world. People from every country need to rally together and become stronger. If we could support one another with love, compassion, and empathy, HUGE and AMAZING things could begin. Even people within the same country should start understanding each other.

Why does it matter where someone is from? Why does it matter what kind of job someone holds? Why does it matter who another person loves? None of these things should matter to anyone. The reasons people feel hatred in their hearts are unacceptable because most of them are meaningless. Unless someone does something to mentally, emotionally, or physically harm someone, there should not be any animosity. One person is not able to fix the issues we see, but if there was a big enough following and joining together, change is possible, and we could all live in peace!

Thank you for visiting my site today and reading this post. I know some people will not agree with a single word in this post, which is okay because these are my feelings. I will respect how you feel but expect the same in return. I would love to read your comments and will respond as quickly as I can. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Beautiful Complications

The world is a beautiful, complicated, and challenging place to live in. There are times we may feel like we are suffocating or drowning in the dark and deep waters because the intensity of what we are facing is so strong. We will also experience days that are bright and full of joyful moments. These days are not normally perfectly balanced, but we have a choice to hold onto our optimism and understand it is a necessity.

As children, we depend on our parents to guide us down the right roads and teach us right from wrong. Sadly enough, not all parents teach these lessons to their children, and they go out into the world blind and unprepared. It leaves me feeling confused because there are so many people in the world that want children and would provide a loving, nurturing, and wonderful home, but they are unable to have children. On the other hand, some never wanted children and should not have them, but they do.

It breaks my heart to see the world being where it is today. The sheer levels of hate and anger tear people down and leave them as nothing more than an empty shell. I have always tried so hard to see the best in people but am struggling more and more to find the good in some that I have encountered. I used to think that there was good in everyone, no matter who they are, and I am not so sure about that anymore.

We are all faced with choices in life, one road will be the one that takes additional effort and honesty and another path, that is that easy path and can include dishonesty. Why does it seem like in the world today, people chose that path that is filled with lies, dishonesty, and deceit? It takes more effort to lie, than it does to be honest because once you begin lying, it is like a snowball effect and never ends and causes people to be hurt and disappointed.

I hate thinking that it is possible that the last honest people in the world, were in my late grandfather’s generation. You cannot turn on the news without hearing lies, deceitful, and dangerous misinformation. So many people are too selfish to understand their behavior is damaging and evil. It is not that difficult to be compassionate and understanding towards other, but it seems like people think if they practice these behaviors, it would be the end of the world.

As you can probably tell in what I have written today, I am frustrated with the mindset and behaviors of others. I do the best I can to treat everyone equally and with respect but have been treated like a nobody by people I thought were different and believed they were caring. I am proud to be different from others because I would not feel good about who I am if I were just like everyone else. What others consider normal, I consider mean and evil, so I have no interest in being what normal is to others.

I have been struggling lately with trying to find a job and understand the way people think and act. As challenging as it has been, I think finding my “perfect” job will happen long before I can understand people because most people do not make sense in anyway shape or form. I do not understand where all the hatred is coming from and why it is spreading like wildfire. It is just a sad situation and I do not know how or when it will improve. Maybe when we see the end of COVID, we will also see positive changes to those currently filled with hate. Stranger things have happened.

Thank you for visiting my site today and reading this post. I know it was not filled with sunshine and rainbows, but it was filled with my honest feelings and struggles. I am not normally a negative person, but I am an optimistic and realistic person. I hope you are enjoying your weekend and staying safe! I do look forward to reading your comments and I will respond as quickly as I can. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Bad News Week

I hope y’all have had a wonderful week and you are looking forward to the weekend. I managed to fall behind with my blog and still have a few comments to respond to. The past few days I have been consumed with either a migraine or back pain that was so awful I could hardly do anything. Wednesday morning, my back pain was in a different location than normal. On a typical day, it is my mid to lower back that is in pain, but Wednesday morning it was only in my lower back and it took me at least fifteen minutes to pull myself from the bed. This pain was like nothing I have experienced before and had me mildly concerned. I did not lift anything in the previous days, so it did not make sense and I detest when things do not make sense.

I started having another mean migraine on Wednesday that nothing would help it to ease up. Having a migraine and the unusual back pain was extremely frustrating and nothing was making any sense. I detest when things do not make sense because I am the type that needs logical answers. I guess with Multiple Sclerosis, answers are one thing I may never get.

I would assume I know why there were so many issues with pain and a migraine. I do believe I could make an educated guess because after dealing with this unpredictable and hateful illness and knowing my body better than anyone else. My assumption for these issues is none other than stress. I feel like I continue getting bad news daily almost like there is a sign on my head saying, “Please do something that is going to create more problems in life” on my forehead. I mean getting laid off on December 9th and two weeks later having my truck in the shop with an expensive repair, and then on Wednesday learning that my former company is not paying out for the PTO I did not use threw me into the worst stress tailspin.

I was counting on the PTO payout for bills, my husband’s birthday, and a few other things. I cannot say I am surprised that my former company was going to screw me over again. Apparently, my former company thinks it is perfectly acceptable to basically steal money from me and it seems they can do that legally.

I have been constantly looking for another job and it has been beyond frustrating. Many places are hiring for remote positions, but it has been almost a month and I am still unemployed. Being unemployed is causing my personality to change and I do not like it. I feel like my anger about what has occurred and keeps happening is causing me to be a little hateful. I love my cats more than I can explain, but my mood even has me being angry with them and not wanting to be anywhere around them.

I am trying my best to stay positive, but it is becoming harder every day. I keep trying to tell myself that everything happens for a reason and the perfect job is out there for me and will surface when the time is right. I do not know what I did wrong in a previous life to have to continue dealing with challenges, but whatever it was I am so sorry. I just really need a break and have something, just one small thing happen work out.

I am working on another post and will hopefully have it completed tonight. I have also been working on a short story to help build on the creativity I know that I have inside. Writing has been an outlet for me and even though two of my cats are doing everything possible to not let me write because they want my attention, it is still the only thing that lets me escape from reality.

Thank you for visiting my site today. I appreciate your time and look forward to reading your comments. I will be responding to comments today and tomorrow, so I will be caught up soon. I hope you have a lovely and safe weekend. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Handling a layoff at Christmas

It is extremely unfortunate, but life tends to be accompanied by various challenges. Everything we go through in our life may seem life-altering and impossible to overcome at the time of the situation. It is critical to try seeing each experience in a logical mindset. If we attempt to process and analyze every challenge at the same time, it can become overwhelming. To avoid becoming overloaded with devastation, take your time to process what you have endured before reacting.

There will never be a good time to encounter any type of challenge. For instance, this past Thursday the mortgage company I was working for did a mass layoff. Although this was something I was expecting to happen, it was still traumatic news. Regrettably, I was one of many included in the layoffs.

Of course, there is never a good time to be laid off from a job, but Christmas time is an incredibly awful time. I have gone through so many emotions since Thursday afternoon and still am processing the atrocious news. The good thing is that I was as prepared as one can be to be laid off from their job. When I accepted the job, I knew it would always be a possibility to happen and I knew that I could not go without health insurance, so I am on my husband’s insurance. If I had to worry about insurance on top of looking for a job, my stress level would skyrocket to unhealthy levels.

I am not sure this is a good way to put it, but another reason I am luckier than others that went through this layoff is my husband and I do not have children. We do not have to worry about feeding children and other expenses that come with children. I cannot imagine what those that were laid off are going through losing a job so close to Christmas. I do know one of the people that were laid off was talking about returning the gifts she bought.

As I continue to try seeing the good things with this layoff, my husband and I live within our means. Meaning we do not have several car payments, a high mortgage, credit card debt, and other debts to worry about paying. I have always believed that we should all live within our means and try our best to have savings account for situations like layoffs.

Even though I am doing my best to stay positive, I do have my moments when I am extremely angry about this. My anger is higher than I would prefer it to be, especially because right before the “layoff” meeting I point blank asked my supervisor if layoffs were coming, which she lied about and said she did not even know what the meeting was about. I mean come on, anyone that would believe that is not being realistic. Along with the anger and often at the same time, I am sad and cry. I know anger and tears are not going to fix the issues, but I am working through the emotions at hand. No matter how hard I try to let go of my anger, I still think it is insensitive, selfish, and evil to do layoffs a couple of weeks away from Christmas.

I am trying to continue reminding myself that everything in life happens for a reason and there is something out there waiting for me that is better than the job I had. Of course, with the issues with COVID, I must find a job working from home. I cannot work in an office setting due to my immune system, so that might be a challenge. There was one good thing that came because of COVID and that is many companies are doing remote work because they realized with some industries, work can be done as easily at home as it is in an office and maybe even more effectively.

I was not going to write about my layoff because it is still so fresh in my mind and heart, but I wanted to share my story and hope it would help anyone else that goes through this type of situation. It is normal to go through many emotions when you lose a job, whether it be from a layoff or being fired. I want to tell y’all, any time one door closes another one opens and what is behind that door might be better and make you even happier. It is so important to know how much you are worth and how valuable you truly are!

Thank you for taking the time to visit my site today. I have learned a valuable lesson from this experience and that is no matter how much you think you can trust a supervisor, you cannot because at the end of the day it is just business. I would love the chance to read your comments about this terrible experience and I promise to respond to all comments as quickly as I can. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Dealing with being let down

Unfortunately, we have all experienced being let down at least once in our lifetime. Maybe you made plans with a friend for a fun outing together, which you were looking forward to. Then as you were getting yourself ready, your friend calls to back out of your plans because of an unexpected issue. Of course, you were understanding because it was out of their control, but that does not mean you were not disappointed.

As with the scenario when a friend backs out of plans last minute, sometimes things happen, and people get sick. What happens when you worked endlessly on a project at work and you were proud of your accomplishment, but then a co-worker steps in and takes credit for your hard work. In a situation like this, you might feel anger, frustration, and or betrayed.

On an entirely different level, when we learn that someone close to us, such as a significant other, parent, child, or other family member betrays our trust, it hurts on a much deeper level. Even simply learning something new about someone we trusted and care about can be difficult for us to believe, especially when it is something surprising and not in a good way. Situations with people we are closest with can make us feel like our world has been turned upside down and inside out.

Before we have had a chance to make sense of any outside threats, our physiological responses acknowledge the negative situations. The physiological responses are our body’s automatic reactions to stimuli. The release of hormones, the rush of blood through our body and into our limbs, an increased heart rate, and accelerated breathing are all subconscious and out of our control. The only thing we do have control over is our breathing through using long and shallow exhales, which sends our body a message of safety and enables access to higher needed cognitive parts of our brain.

We are all only human and painful emotions are not easy to deal with. As humans, we are hard-wired to want to run as far away from pain as we can. It is in our instincts to try distracting ourselves from the pain in ways that bring pleasure, even if the pleasure is only short-lived. Unfortunately, this can lead us into devastating and disastrous behaviors to numb the pain we are experiencing. There are better and healthier alternatives to try, such as self-compassion practices that allow ways to embrace and understand the pain. This will provide you with a space to be silent and establish lost trust in a temporary safe place until you can understand things clearly.

It is important to carefully listen while your thoughts surface. It can be easy to attach yourself to your thoughts and let them run with their version of the events that took place. This is not going to be a useful thing to do because our minds will naturally find ways to confirm the way we are thinking and strengthen, instead of allowing healing. We must find a way to detach from the story being played out in our minds and be open to further truth and forgiveness.

No one can tell you how you should feel when someone you love lets you down. By practicing the tips shared in this post, you will be able to distance yourself from an emotional reaction and allow the wisdom within yourself to guide you to the best response. Of course, this does not mean you need to forgive or let go of what has occurred, at least not until you are ready to do so. Trust and listen to your heart and mind, as this will typically lead you down the right path.

Although I hope the information in this post was beneficial to you, I also hope you have not been let down too often. I understand how painful it is to be let down by someone you love, but in some way, it will make you a better and stronger person. I would love the chance to read what you thought of this post, and I will respond to all comments as quickly as I can.

Thank you for visiting my site today and taking the time to read what I have written. I hope you are having a good week and you are continuing to stay safe. The good news about today is, we are almost to the weekend again. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Different types of Anger

Anger is an emotion that can touch anyone and everyone at some point in their life. This emotion can intrude on the mind and hearts of even the kindest of people and take control of their life. If not properly dealt with can become one of the unhealthiest types of emotions and destroy relationships. Even though it is toxic, anger is a normal reaction of hostility when there is a threat that another has intentionally or unintentionally wronged you.

There are many different types of anger that I am going to explain through this post. My hope is this can help to identify that type of anger you are experiencing, and it will provide an understanding of the source of your anger, and that will lead to learning ways to not only control the anger but manage it as well.

Out of all the different types of anger, assertive anger is thought to be a productive and healthier way of expression. Instead of avoiding the conversation and being susceptible to outbursts, assertive anger expresses frustrations to discover a positive change or resolution. This could be someone starting a conversation by saying, “I feel angry when or because…” This allows a person to explain their anger in a way that provides positive change instead of creating more negativity.

Destructive anger is a very unhealthy way of experiencing anger and comes with various negative impacts. This falls on the extreme side of behavioral anger. Destructive anger can appear as verbal or physical actions being used to hurt another person. A person might throw or break things that are valuable to the person they are angry with. This type of anger can negatively influence many areas of the person’s life and possibly destroy social connections and relationships.

Behavioral anger can become dangerous and be expressed with violence. This type of anger can lead to destructive anger and be common in men that already have anger issues. Behavioral anger is unpredictable and reckless, which can end with legal consequences. This type of anger can be displayed by intimidating behaviors, throwing, or breaking things, or attacking a person.

Chronic anger tends to be directed towards other people, situations, and yourself. This type of anger can have a profound impact on one’s self-esteem and while not always visible can create a lot of damage. Chronic anger resembles a continual, low amount of anger, resentment, irritation, and exasperation. Depending on how an individual experiences anger, it may be difficult to process and communicate your needs, which can negatively affect your health, levels of stress, and relationships.

Overwhelmed anger can build up over time, especially if you do not find ways to express your feelings. This anger is unpredictable and over time directly and negatively affects your mental health. Overwhelmed anger may show itself once you hit a breaking point, you lose your ability to cope, and the stress becomes too much to handle. This may look like a sudden snap of irritation and resentment that follows a long person of time repressing feelings.

Passive-aggressive anger is one of the most common and avoidable types of anger. The person experiencing this type of anger will express their negative feelings indirectly, instead of discussing them openly. This can be both mentally and physically draining, especially until you can address the way you are feeling. Passive-aggressive anger may also include repressing emotions and waiting to avoid conflicts. Even though the person feels angry and resentful, they will act neutral, pleasant, and happy. This type of anger can be displayed verbally or physically in ways such as silent treatment or sarcasm.

Retaliatory anger is a typical and instinctual reaction when someone feels they are being attacked. This is strongly manipulated by the desire for revenge after being hurt. This type of anger is consciously directed towards the person that wronged you and the need to gain control after an incident occurred. Retaliatory anger can force discomfort and outrage to escalate in relationships, which will only create more problems.

Silent anger is a non-verbal way to experience anger. This can be an internal and external experience. The internal way can be when anger manifests with non-communicated bitterness, resentment, and irritation. This can cause a tremendous amount of stress and tension. Externally, the anger may be displayed with closed off body language and facial expressions. Even though the anger has not been expressed verbally, people may be able to read your body language and know you are angry.

Thank you for visiting my site today. After reading about the different types of anger, were you able to decipher the type or types of anger you encounter? When you experience anger, how do you get it under better control. To be completely honest, I try to avoid feelings of anger, but then they do fester and make things so much more intense. I guess I would fall somewhere between silent and passive-aggressive anger. I hope the last few hours of the weekend are relaxing and help you to be ready for the new week starting tomorrow. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Random acts of violence

Unfortunately, it is not uncommon to hear about violence taking place in the United States. Anytime we turn on the TV there is at least one, if not more awful things happening. We are constantly hearing about mass shootings, cops killing unarmed people (most often black men), or other acts of violence where innocent people are dying Some people have become desensitized to the various amount of hate-filled violence that occurs, which these acts cause others vast levels of distress and despair.

When you combine isolation due to COVID and feelings of despair from the violence taking place, the emotional impact can be extremely intense. Of course, working from home is great, but I do feel very isolated and like I am on house arrest a lot. Situations like what happened with George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Rayshard Brooks, and countless others murdered by those that are “supposed” to protect and serve, the police cause me to feel anxious and angry and I am not an angry person. The case against Derek Chauvin, the police officer who murdered George Floyd in Minneapolis had me on edge. When I watched the verdict being read it did give me a glimmer of hope, but there is still a lot that needs to be done.

The recent and senseless mass shootings that have occurred in the United States are heart-wrenching. The one on March 16, in Atlanta GA at 3 spas left 8 people dead, 6 of which were women of Asian descent. It has been stated this murder rampage was due to anti-Asian racism, which does not make any sense to me. These women were innocent and simply doing their job to take care of their families. Atlanta, GA is only about two and a half hours from where I live, but these acts can happen anywhere because the levels of hate and racist behavior are exceedingly high. I do not understand why some many Americans have any issue with people of Asian descent because these people are NOT doing anything wrong or causing any harm to anyone else.

Only six days later, on March 22 in Boulder, CO another gunman went on a shooting rampage at a supermarket. This incident left 10 innocent people who were at a grocery store picking up items needed dead. People that knew this 21-year-old gunman said he was prone to anger problems and his arrest record showed where he assaulted a classmate in 2017. It was obvious this person had issues, so why was something not done to help him?

Less than a month later on April 15 in Indianapolis, IN at a FedEx facility a gunman started shooting people in the parking lot before he continued his shooting spree inside the building. This mass shooting left 8 innocent people dead before the gunman turned the gun onto himself. Not to sound insensitive, but if the end result was taking his own life, why did he not just do that in the beginning and leave the innocent people he killed alive?

There are no motives to make sense of these tragic deaths or to make it easier for the 26 families that lost a loved one. Even though there is not anything we can do for those affected by these events, there are ways we can help ourselves to cope better.

We have all been dealing with the pandemic for over a year now, often fearing for our safety, as well as for those we love because this virus is deadly. Then adding mass amounts of violence can shake communities to their foundations. Whether you live in the United States or another country, how do these situations make you feel? Some of us may feel like we are in danger if we just go to the grocery store or other normal activities outside the home. Other common reactions may include numbness and shock, difficulty making decisions, anger, inability to turn off the images seen on the news, tension, anxiety, loss of appetite, headaches, disturbed sleep and bad dreams, and or worry about future mass violence events.

Just knowing about these traumatic situations can be emotionally draining and cause you to feel unstable with typical life challenges. Issues with work, ongoing issues with the pandemic, financial struggles, or just staying on top of our daily activities can feel overwhelming and stressful. Try being kinder, patient, and more understanding with yourself because you are not alone.

Urgent do not forget to take care of yourself. Everyone reacts to these situations differently. It does not matter if an act of violence occurred where you live or on the other side of the world because our mind and body can react as if it were much closer. The following eight tips are ways we can practice self-care.

1. Safeguard your body’s needs by focusing on eating healthy, get proper amounts of sleep, and spending time outdoors.

2. Stay active in ways you are comfortable with. There is no need to push yourself too far and causing any extra stress on your body.

3. Embrace relaxation exercises such as meditation and relaxing breathing techniques.

4. Maintain a consistent bedtime routine to help you relax at night.

5. Collect information regarding the available mental health services and support.

6. Avoid using alcohol and drugs to help you cope.

7. Take the necessary breaks from watching the news on TV and or social media.

8. Give your attention to things you enjoy such as listening to music, walking, writing, other types of arts and crafts.

I know this post was not very uplifting or positive, but these are real issues the world is facing, and they are upsetting me tremendously. I do not like being negative or angry but wanted to bring these issues to everyone’s attention. This was not to upset anyone or ruin your day, so please forgive me.

I want to thank you for visiting my site today and reading this post. I hope you are having a good week and continuing to stay safe! Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa