Wednesday’s Random Thoughts

My Random Thoughts

Happy Wednesday y’all. I hope you are having a great week, you are feeling well, and of course, you are staying safe. I keep telling myself to stop obsessing about new COVID-19 cases in the city I live in, but yet I continue monitoring the massive increases daily. It doesn’t make any sense why I keep doing this because all it does is upset me and keep me stressed. I do not leave the house most days unless it is necessary and when I do, I always wear my mask inside places like the grocery store. It blows my mind how many people do not wear a mask and hardly ever respect social distancing. I am not sure which irritates me more, the carelessness of not wearing a mask, or the complete lack of awareness for social distancing. I was thrilled to hear the city I live in passed a law requiring people to wear a mask anytime they leave the house and will be fined if they do not. I think this should have happened months ago!

Do y’all ever have days when there is so much on your mind and numerous things you want to do, but then feel overwhelmed and do not do any of the things you wanted to? Or when your mind is consumed with things you want to write about, but then you just end up staring at a blank page for hours or constantly erasing what you just typed or wrote? I tend to have days like this a lot and do not know what to do about it. Do y’all have any advice? I may being feeling this way because I have not worked in several months and therefore I am not on any logical kind of schedule, which drives me crazy.

Life can sometimes feel more like a very long and nerve-wracking rollercoaster ride with many added sharp curves and free falls. The moment we think things are getting easier and it is safe to take a deep breath, we face another painful challenge. Sadly, I honestly feel like too much has taken place over the past four months or so and there doesn’t seem to be relief or improvement anytime soon.

I don’t think it would surprise anyone, but what we have witnessed recently has been heartbreaking and terrifying. The other situations that have made the news are things we have known to be hellacious issues for a long time, these mainly being inequality, racism, and pure hatred. Y’all know that I tend to blame negative things that happen on the president and even though things he says might fuel hate and racism, the issues wouldn’t be fueled if the people didn’t already feel a certain way to start with.

No one on the face of this earth has ever gone through a pandemic like the one we are seeing now with COVID-19. I do not even think anyone has thought of something this awful. COVID-19 has put fear in people around the world. Unlike some people in the world, COVID-19 does not discriminate and has affected people from all walks of life.

Even though I am viewing the world in different ways right now, not everything is horrible and stressful. Of course, the issues with the virus do cause me stress and sadness. I hate knowing some people that get this virus will lose their life and their family will have that pain to deal with. And even though I am a small-town girl that grew up in a state with no diversity and moved to a big city with LOTS of diversity when I was 19, racism will NEVER make sense to me. I have always believed that everyone was equal and deserved our respect. With people, the only thing that matters to me is how they treat others and the color of their skin, who they love, who they worship, or anything else that is different from my views does not matter.

Thank y’all for visiting my site today and reading some of the thoughts that have been racing through my mind for a while now. No pressure at all, but I would love to read your thoughts on this post! I promise to respond to all comments as quickly as possible! I hope you are having a good day so far and it continues to be pleasant. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, and many positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

What does our world need most??

12 Things Our World Needs Now!

Even though we may be oceans or miles apart, we are all still living under the same bright and beautiful sky. Unfortunately, the world we live in has been anything but peaceful for far too long. Countless numbers of people have been and continue to encounter uncertainty, increased stress, and escalated pain, an absence of hope, and inequality. Currently, our world is suffering and to have successful change we need to be united. No matter where you live, our goals are the same.

The things the world is in dire need of can be accomplished if everyone works together in unity. The great things that may happen will take time, patience, and resilience.

The following are what is urgently required for the good of this world:

1. Action-

There are numerous challenges we are facing and these challenges are not going to resolve on their own. People are constantly complaining about everything that isn’t right, but none of that is doing anything beneficial.

We need REAL action on poverty, climate changes, the mental health crisis, COVID-19, racial inequality, reckless and carelessness with the government, and much more. Without people, communities, politicians, and all nations taking action by joining together, the change that is required won’t ever take place.

2. Unity-

The challenges that have spread throughout the entire world will not be able to correct themselves unless we all JOIN TOGETHER! We do not need to live in the same state or even the same country, but we can help one another in achieving a common goal, PEACE & EQUALITY! Each and every one of us is alike concerning having a heart full of love, kindness, and acceptance. We are also uniquely different with adding our support for the greater good of the world.

3. Tolerance-

There is more division between people both within the same country and others. If we are going to successfully join together we will need to learn how to be tolerant to those we disagree with. There must be less of the terminology of us and them and more we and us. Tolerance means we need to put unnecessary loyalties aside and only have loyalty for human lives.

4. Acceptance-

Of course, we do not have to agree with everyone else all of the time. The opinion of others should be accepted with just as much validity as our own. Beneath the difference of opinions and disagreements, there is another human being that deserves respect and kindness.

5. Understanding-

As human beings, we are all a convoluted mixture of thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. It is common for those same humans to do things that gets on our nerves and even upsets us, but we need to try understanding the reason they may have done what they did. Unfortunately, many people go through struggles daily, but normally we are unaware of this. Especially with all that is happening in the world today it is important to try offering our understanding to others because chances are we are also experiencing our own challenging times.

6. Compassion-

There are going to be time we may see someone that is enduring a struggle. Although we might not be aware of the cause for their struggles, it is important to show our sincere, genuine, and wholehearted concerns for them. We have all heard this many times before, but a little compassion indeed goes a long way! It is amazing how helpful it can be when we offer someone who is going through struggles a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen and some comforting warm and supportive words.

7. Forgiveness-

Anyone can do things that they will regret later and whatever was done could hurt another. Honestly, forgiveness is not the easiest thing to do, especially in this day and age. When we forgive it doesn’t mean what was done is forgotten or that we are excusing someone else’s actions because that just isn’t true. When we decide to forgive someone, we are moving on and we are not harboring negative feelings towards that person.

Forgiveness is something necessary between the different cultures, nations, and generations. There is already too much anger, disagreements, and resentment that has been widespread, but this is the time the world and everyone in it needs forgiveness that spreads far and to all!

8. Kindness-

Countless people are suffering and daily more are faced with various misfortunes. Kindness is something that will surpass all faiths, ages, backgrounds, languages, and even reach beyond vast distances. It does not matter how big or small, all acts of kindness can make the world a better place in limitless ways. Bottom line is, the entire world is in an extreme need for a lot more kindness!

9. Trust-

Whether this is true or false, many people believe that everyone is out for themselves with little to no thoughts for anyone else. They also view others as being not trustworthy. Trust is the foundation in all human relationships and without it things can and will rapidly fall apart. We should be able to feel confident and comfortable putting our trust in those that are in our lives, but if we are not able to do this we might need to reevaluate who we are allowing into our lives. Trust takes time to earn and it can be lost quickly. Sadly, once trust has been lost it can take a very long time to earn back and even then can be challenging.

10. Hope-

Unfortunately, during recent times hope has gotten lost for many people. Although most people desire for things to be better, they have also lost the ability to have true hope that anything will get better than they are currently. Hope is what can invigorate the action necessary to resolve the many problems we are dealing with today. We need people to demonstrate the meaning and benefits of the power of hope through their actions. Once more people believe again and have the hope that tomorrow will bring better times; it will spread throughout our world!

11. Wisdom-

It does seem that most people have a smartphone, tablet, or they have both and have the answers needed at our fingertips anywhere we go. The thing is the knowledge we think we are gaining doesn’t necessarily translate to wisdom. What some are not aware of is there is a significant difference between wisdom and knowledge, which is mainly the quality.

12. Contentment-

While it is great many people want to continue to endeavor with achieving more, it also can turn toxic if it isn’t regulated. This does not mean regulated by stronger powers, it means to regulated the constant wanting more. Instead of always wanting more, there needs to be a time when we can look at all we do have in the present and be thankful for it. Many still don’t understand that more doesn’t mean better and need to realize what it means to simply be at peace with the life we have and all we have in our lives.

Thank you for visiting my site today. I hope what was written in this post was beneficial for you and also provides thoughts of pride because you are a kind and loving person. We are all going through many hard times, which can cause stress and frustration. These are things I can completely understand and sincerely wish there was something I could do to give assurance to everyone. When life gets challenging people will either jump into help or run away from the sadness. I wish there was a warm and sunny place we could all hide from what is going on, but regrettably there isn’t. The best way we can cope is to be supportive and understanding, but also feel like you have someone who understands and will offer support!

I know it is only Tuesday, but I hope your week going well and you are feeling the best you possibly can. I know I just wrote a lot, but I do want to know what you think. I promise to respond to all comments as quickly as I can! Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, and many positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Boundaries and how to set them

Do you ever feel trapped within other people’s problems because they constantly lean on you for either advice or help? Do your friends and even family know you will always lend an ear to whatever they are going through, even when it is self-inflicted? How many times has what whoever comes to you with their latest problem or problems did it make you feel an incredible amount of emotional pain that was almost suffocating?

The truth is I have never been able to turn my back on anything that was in distress and needed someone to talk to. It is not in my nature to tell someone I can or do not have time to listen and attempt to help them. Is it even possible to avoid becoming emotionally involved when an individual you care about is struggling? Even though we do always want to be compassionate, empathetic, supportive, solicitous, and caring, there can come a time when we need to consider our own well-being over another’s.

I am sure that everyone has heard about the importance of developing personal boundaries and has probably implemented them by now. Even though I am very aware of the fact I need to set boundaries, but I have yet to execute any what-so-ever. I guess the reason I decided to write about boundaries is that I need and want to learn how to set boundaries before losing too much too myself and feeling resentful way too frequently.

We all have our limits to what we are willing and able to cope with, after all, we are only human and unfortunately do not have magical powers. How many times throughout your life have your friends, co-workers, or family pushed far beyond the limits you are willing to deal with? I can say without hesitation that I don’t think I can count the number of times using both my fingers and toes. Once you have been unsuccessful in separating yourself from what others are going through as much as I have, you are going to want to find change. Often the changes we desire to make are not easy and can be outright frustrating, but with enough perseverance anything is possible!

I have heard many people talk about how crucial it is to have boundaries in all of our relationships. With that said, how would you define boundaries? It is my understanding that boundaries are the limits we put in place with other people. These boundaries specify what we find to be both acceptable and unacceptable in the way others behave towards us.

Our capability of knowing our boundaries typically comes from our sense of self-worth or evaluating one’s self in ways that are NOT dependent on anyone else or the feelings others may have towards another. Self-worth is about discovering the natural value of who we are, which helps our awareness of the following:

1. Intellectual Worth which means just like you are entitled to your thoughts and opinions, everyone else is as well.

2. Emotional Worth means you are entitled to your feelings towards any situation, everyone else should be given the same respect.

3. Physical Worth refers to no matter how broad the space is you are entitled to your personal space as do others.

4. Social Worth means just as you are entitled to your friends and the ability to pursue your social activities, so do others.

5. Spiritual Worth means just as you are entitled to your spiritual beliefs, so is everyone else.

To set boundaries it is important to fully understand that four different types which can be defined as the following:

Physical Boundaries are the easiest to define because they are external and seen.

These boundaries can be described as your office, your desk, your computer that is password-protected, and your money in your bank account, your car that is locked, and your body.

Over the years as I got older the one boundary I never had an issue with is my physical boundary. I do not like for people to come too close to me or put their hands on me. Concerning my personal boundaries, before social distancing, I do not want anyone invading the space between me and the length of my arms.

Mental Boundaries are regarding to our personal thoughts.

It is impossible for two people to always agree on everything all of the time. Each individual is entitled to their thoughts, opinions, values, and beliefs. We all want our mental boundaries respected, so we must reciprocate the same respect to others.

I can say that when I am having a conversation with someone that has opposing views than I have, I am stubborn enough to know I will not change my thought process. When discussing something I am extremely passionate about and believe strongly in, I will simply explain my reasoning to the other person and understand everyone is free to have their own beliefs and I will not try changing the other person.

Emotional Boundaries are what gives us the freedom to feel how we feel.

Setting healthy emotional boundaries has two distinct and beneficial purposes. They help prevent us from inflicting others with our emotion and unloading continuously on anyone that will listen, which later we will probably regret doing. Emotional boundaries assist us in managing our emotions in appropriate and healthy ways.

The other aspect of emotional boundaries is they prevent us from taking on and carrying other’s emotions that constantly share. The emotional boundaries we put in place are meant to disconnect our emotions from another person’s emotions, which is where I consistently fail. If someone close to me is struggling and distressed, I want more than anything to be able to help them with love, empathy, and advice. It is painfully difficult accepting that I can’t help or force them to do things I think are mortally right, they are the only person that can help themselves through their problems.

Spiritual Boundaries are protecting our beliefs and regarding to our sense of spirituality.

We are all entitled to believe in what we feel and we should never dismiss what anyone else believes, as no one else should dismiss ours.

Our personal boundaries come in three distinct categories which are defined as:

1. Healthy Boundaries meaning not only does a person value their opinion, but also do not compromise their values for anyone else. They are also welcoming and accepting when others say “NO” to them.

2. Rigid Boundaries are when a person avoids both intimate and has very few close relationships. Typically never asks for any help and often seems to be detached. Those with rigid boundaries distance themselves from others to avoid rejection.

3. Porous Boundaries are when individuals share too much personal information. Not only do those with this form of boundaries have a hard time saying “NO” to other’s requests, but they also become overly consumed with the problems other people are going through. These individuals tolerate abuse and or being disrespected.

If you already have established boundaries in your relationships, that is great and I applaud you for that. On the other hand, if you are like me and want to set boundaries in place for your well-being, I am glad that I am not alone and we can tackle this together. I have found various ways to implement boundaries, but I figure it is best to start easy. I am going to share the four simple steps for straight-forward boundaries.

1. Understand and recognize your limits-

Clearly describe your intellectual, emotional, physical, and spiritual boundaries with all your relationships first. Take the time to scrutinize previous experiences when you felt unsettled, irritated, bitter, resentful, and or disappointed. It is reasonable the reason we felt this way was a result of your limits being violated.

2. Be assertive-

Taking time to create and explain your boundaries is a step in the right direction, but maintaining follow-through is also critical. When someone invades our boundaries the only they are going to know is if we are direct and assertive with that them.

3. Practice makes perfect-

Being assertive may not come naturally to you because you are worried people will view you as mean and or rude. When we confirm what our boundaries are it shows that you value yourself, your needs, and your feelings more than what others think. It does not indicate you are being rude or even mean when you are assertive; it actually means you are being honest and fair with the other person.

4. If all else fails, delete, ignore, and move on-

Of course, we need to voice what our boundaries are first and then follow an action plan. You do need to tie up any loose ends and given family, friends, co-workers, and whoever else about the cease to any promises previously made, and you no longer owe them anything more. Once you asserted yourself and made things crystal clear, if they choose to violate your boundaries, it is perfectly acceptable to simply ignore them.

Thank you for taking the time to visit my site today. I hope the information provided was beneficial for you. Life is short and being constantly consumed with everyone else’s problems can be draining. I am hoping that developing boundaries, I will be less stressed and frustrated with the problems I hear about. I would love it if you have any other advice for anyone that wants to develop boundaries, you will share your knowledge! I hope your weekend is going well and you are staying very safe. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, and many positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

The Bright Side of Negative Feelings

We have all heard that there is power in positive thinking, which I have always believed to be true. Even though we need to try finding the positive aspects of most situations we encounter in life, sometimes is still can be nearly impossible to not recognize and acknowledge our negative feelings. Do you think it is possible to maintain a positive mindset most of the time, but that it also isn’t healthy to ignore our negative feelings?

In this post I am going to share with you some critical reasons why we should not ignore our negative feelings when they appear, but instead embrace them.

1. Negative feelings can be viewed as a powerful warning method-

What does our fear do for us? Fear warns us of imminent danger and urges us to take action. Our negative feelings basically do the same and are acting as an alarm that signals possible harm in some form. This hard could be physical, emotional, or mental depending on what is going on in life.

We all pay attention when we feel fear, so why shouldn’t we embrace negative feelings? We should ask ourselves the question, why we are experiencing these negative emotions? Is there something we should be avoiding? Does this mean we should be taking another path in life?

2. Negative feelings are trying to tell us that something is NOT right-

I have just explained how our negative feelings notify us of possible danger, but they also can be warning that something in our life isn’t right. Maybe it is something in our relationship, our career, or something with our health, or even something we continue to put off has issues that we need to address. Often we should not view our negative feelings as merely a nuisance, but more as a good friend that has our best interests in mind.

3. Negative emotions can encourage us to take beneficial actions-

Unfortunately, we have all received bad news that caused us sadness. When this happens, what is the first thing we do? It is human nature to feel down and even feel sorry for ourselves. Instead of ignoring these negative feelings, it might be better to embrace them. Acknowledge the feelings we are experiencing and allow them to help us find a logical solution.

We should not deny or apologize for our negative emotions. Nor should we allow these negative emotions to paralyze us or overwhelm us. We are allowed to feel what we feel, whenever we feel what we feel and never dismiss those emotions. We are feeling how we feel for a reason and maybe we should explore them.

4. Negative feelings allow us to welcome and appreciate the good life has to offer-

How would you feel if everything in life went the same and was predictable? If every moment of our life was always happy and content, there would not be any negative feelings that would make the positive feelings more appreciated when they occur. All of us need to understand that no matter how much pain and distress we may deal with, life will also provide us with happiness and comfort.

5. Negative feelings provide us confirmation of what is important-

A well-founded signal you have come into your core values is when you have negative feelings. Maybe you violated one of your values or you failed to follow through with a promise and you are feeling guilty for this. Negative feelings are commonly a crucial assertion that we are honoring our beliefs, values, and views.

6. Negative feelings invite us to contemplate-

Allowing ourselves to have negative feelings allows us the opportunity to think deeply about things we did not give adequate time to previously. It is possible, we need to consider our health practices or spending habits or maybe something we have continued putting off for a long period, but are all things that need to be dealt with. Embracing and acknowledging our negative feelings may not be easy, but they are needed for our mental, physical, and emotional health.

7. Negative feelings can help protect us when we feel overburden-

Many of us tend to overdo things and push ourselves beyond the limits we are aware of. When we do over extend ourselves, we will hopefully begin feeling negative feelings such as frustration and irritability. These feelings are our body’s way to telling us to start facing ourselves and start limiting the amount of additional commitments we take on. We must listen to our inner voice and pay attention to the warnings our negative feelings are trying to notify us of.

8. Negative feelings offer healing-

We do not need to have thick skin or be referred to as overly sensitive; we just need to take time to heal when someone else causes us pain. If another person does or says something hurtful, it is very common to have negative feelings regarding the situation. Denying our feelings, no matter how negative they maybe will not speed up our healing process. This means it might be beneficial to use those negative feelings to promote our healing and take the time needed to do so without rushing ourselves.

9. Negative feelings will not allow a denial of reality-

It is important we know and understand that denying our feelings will not be a successful way to get over our negative feelings. Pretending something doesn’t bother us will never make that lie be the truth and could end up causing more issues and pain for the future. When something or someone causes us pain, it is perfectly fine to grieve the loss and disappointment. The only true way to get over disappointment and or hurt is the face the problem, mend the wounds, and move on with the life you deserve.

I hope the information in this post was beneficial for you, especially if you are going through a difficult time. It is never easy to face what has caused us pain, but we will be better off in the long run if we do so. I am sure there are several other ways that would be helpful and would love to read any comments you may have. The entire world is dealing with hard times right now and we all need to help and support one another. Until times get a little easier being kind, compassionate, and empathetic to what others are dealing is extremely important. I also wanted to say, please do not take this post as a negative, but to just say it is okay to have negative feelings because we are only human!

Thank you so much for visiting my site today. I hope you had a lovely week and you will enjoy a safe and happy weekend! Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, and many positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

How to be Free of Bad Habits

How-to-Break-Bad-Habits-1What is meant by bad habits? Bad habits are defined as a patterned behavior that is considered to be detrimental to one’s physical and or mental health. This is typically linked to a high level of discipline and self-control. No matter who you are unfortunately we all have bad habits that we want to be free from.

Many people will end up dealing with stress and boredom with bad habits. If you can 15WELLSTRESS-superJumbothink back to a time you were faced with a stressful situation, how did you deal with those negative feelings? While many things are viewed as bad habits, I normally end up biting my nails or pick at the skin around my fingers. What would you say your bad habits are?

We all know it is not easy to break bad habits, but it is important to at least try and not give up. I do have several bad habits I would like to be free from to proceed with a healthier and fulfilling life. I have discovered several ways to eliminate bad habits and would love to get your how-habits-work-e1527142989402feedback on them.

  1. The first step is determining the core of your bad habit. Charles Duhigg, a Pulitzer-prize winning American journalist and non-fiction author, has determined three basic parts to our habits. Our habits primarily work in a cycle of these parts.
  • The Cue– This is the feeling, time, or location which triggers your habits, good or bad.
  • The Routine- This is whatever the habit itself is.
  • The Reward- This is the craving that the habit satisfies.

Taking the time to understand each of the components is the first step to seizing our work-towards-positive-goals-e1527142980586habits. It may be beneficial to write down the cue, routine, and reward for whichever habit you decide you want to break, ask yourself:

What triggered the routine?

What is the craving the body is trying to satisfy?

  1. Change your surroundings-

At this point we have already determined the cue or cues that are responsible for your-surroundings-may-change-but-your-essence-and-your-personality-pretty-meaningtriggering our bad habits. Logically, we can understand once we manage to eliminate what cues our habits initiate, there will no longer be anything prompting the habit cycle to begin. Changing our surroundings can remove the cues causing our bad habits. One study that was done in a university, researchers found that students who transferred to a new university were far more likely to change their bad habits, than the students that did not change universities. This occurred because the students that changed universities did not have certain cues that were the cause of their bad habits.

  1. Focus on one bad habit at a time-1_gRP3W-OyXkTOgnsL-vFcVQ

Many of us have more than one bad habit we would like to eliminate. Trying to tackle too many habits at a time will on decrease our abilities for successful outcomes. To successfully eliminate our bad habits, it is crucial to focus all of our attention on just one habit before we try handling another one.

  1. View your goal as a positive-

Another key element of habits is the routine, which is the behavior that is triggered by achievementthe cue. In other words, it is the habit you want to eliminate. Typically, when we set goals for ourselves we are not putting them in a positive frame of mind, but instead they are in a negative mindset. Our brain’s habit system responds better to positive goals. For instance, instead of your goal being “I will stop eating junk food” try “I am going to eat healthier”.

Psychologists have suggested that pursuing negative goals is linked with feelings of inadequacy and decreased self-esteem, which can discourage us from taking action. People tend to find it easier to become motivated by positive goals, which increase the opportunity for successfully achieving our goals.

  1. Replace the bad with the good you love-how-to-replace-your-habit-e1527143114914

Quitting a habit altogether seldom work out the way we intended. Once a habit is formed, it becomes an instinct for us to follow through with the routine because our brains are wired to see the cue and desired reward. Instead of completely eliminating habits, keep the old cue and reward, but start a new routine.

***In a future post I will go through a few bad habits and how to eliminate them***

  1. Forgive yourself if you relapse-

It is not easy to break bad habits and there is always a possibility you will go back to ForgetForgiveyour old ways several times before achieving your ultimate goal. You have probably heard old habit die hard, well that couldn’t be any truer! It is important to allow yourself the chance to try again and not be angry about any setbacks. You will have a far better chance at achieving your goals if you do not deter yourself with negative and disappointing thoughts.

  1. Keep your goals to yourself-you-are-more-likely-to-achieve-your-goals-if-you-17815709

We might think that sharing our goals with others would be encouraging, but this actually lowers our chances of success. Once we tell people about the goals we have set for ourselves, they will view us a little different and this could falsely assure the mind that the identity goal is partially complete and you might not put the effort in that is needed reach your goal.

love and supportThank you for visiting my site today. I hope your weekend has started off great and you are feeling the best you can. I am excited to read your feedback on this post and anything you have tried to free yourself of bad habits, I promise to respond as quickly as I can. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love ❤, comfort, and many positive vibes!

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❤Always, Alyssa❤

 

Open letter to the president, vice president & other leaders

open letterThis post is my open letter to the current president, vice president, and other leaders. I am sorry in advance if what I have stated creates any ill feelings, but this is the way I feel about things.

To the president, vice president, and others in power,

While the world has been under attack from a deadly virus, shouldn’t you be protecting and defending the country and people you represent? Are you unable to see the damage you are doing daily? You were made aware of the virus that has caused extensive turmoil long before you bothered to act on it. We have all been terrified of this virus and those, like myself with a compromised immune system have lived in fear for months. 

How long did you say COVID-19 was a democratic hoax or not all that serious? You tried blaming everyone but the person you have to see in the mirror every day. Do you think if you acted like a president, a real leader sooner, lives could have been saved? Instead of thinking of your presidential duties as a TV show, you should be thinking of the lives you have endangered. Instead of leaning on Twitter and calling journalist fake news, you should be behaving in a much more mature manner instead of the childish ways you are.

Three and a half years into you being the president of the United States, you still feel threatened by our previous president. You are even trying to blame your failures on him and why? Obama was not perfect, but he did care more about American lives that you ever have.

I am not saying things would have been drastically different if only you acted on the information you were provided because we will never know now. It is obvious you somehow have supporters and those people listen and believe your lies. Too many followed your idea about ingesting disinfectants, which cause chaos. The people that believe what comes out of your mouth isn’t necessarily your fault, they are just ignorant and unable to think for themselves.

What I would like to ask of you is to please start thinking about the millions of people you represent. Start putting our needs above your egotistical mindset. You are currently the president of the most powerful country in the world, so start acting like it. Yes, COVID-19 did begin in China and yet the numbers of cases and deaths in the United States are higher than any other country in the world because of you. We are not able to go back in time to repair the numerous disturbances and lives destroyed because of your inability to act as you care about anyone besides yourself. You can start today treating people like they matter. You can start to have respect for journalists that are just doing their job. You can start being a president!

Thank you for visiting my site today and reading my extremely frustrated letter to thosewe are in this together in power. Again, I am sorry if anything I wrote offended you. Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs and if you do feel the president is doing well for the people and country that is your choice and I can respect that. I only hope you can respect my feelings and thoughts on how much damage has happened to the country and how many lives were impacted by things not be handled immediately. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love ❤, comfort, and many positive vibes!

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❤Always, Alyssa❤

The Art Of Not Letting Things Bother You

Wisdom-Quotes-About-Life-Lessons-1Our lives are full of small problems, huge problems, and everything in between. These problems we face can require a significant amount of resilience to protect our emotional well-being. Allowing someone else the power to dictate our emotions should never be allowed. We must remain in control of our happiness and peace because no one else cares as much as we do.

We are only human and have feelings that should never be ignored or dismissed. It is logical and normal to have negative emotions when we feel we weren’t treated fairly or things didn’t go the way we thought they would.recognize

With all of this being said, there has to be a way to overcome these problems, right? I have discovered a 7-step process to alleviate the negative emotions felt and establish ways to not allow things to cause us distress.

  1. Recognize the circumstances:

An uncomplicated way to resolve a problem is to recall what exactly the problem is. It may help to break the issue problem down into a simple feasible statement, which will allow you to see clearly what you are enduring.

  1. Understand what and why:

We must be able to comprehend what we are feeling to develop the best approach to handling what we are feeling. If we do not understand what we are feeling, we will not be capable of diffusing those emotions. Whatever we are dealing with can cause an intense combination of emotions. There might be times we are sad, angry, frustrated, and disappointed all at the same time. So having a plan to deal with our emotions will be beneficial to secure our mental well-factsbeing.

  1. What are the facts of the situation?

It is very easy for our emotions to blur what is real and true. We might be so angry that we are unable to see our role in the situation or be able to scrutinize the circumstances. Focusing solely on the facts of any situation does not require any of our emotions because facts are or are not. The facts can keep us balance as we cope with the issues.

  1. Ask yourself, “What am I culpable for in this situation?”responsible

We have already determined the facts regarding the situation we are dealing with. Now we need to acknowledge any part of the situation we might be at fault for. This step is important for diffusing conflicts because many actions of others are directed by what is going through their minds. Periodically things are going to happen and we have no control over them.

  1. Feel the way we do and then let it go:

Sometimes we will not be able to avoid the issues that trouble us. It is normal and feel what you needhealthy to have negative emotions when unforeseen and or unpleasant things occur in our life. The negative emotions we experience force us to take action to ameliorate our situation. When we are unhappy with something in our life, our brain persuades us to do something to alter our situation.

We can only allow ourselves so much time to think about the negative situation before it causes us to become cynical. Continuing to dwell on the negative situation will not change anything. We need to stay active drawing our attention to something besides the negative event that took place. It is possible we need to process how we are feeling several times before we manage to find tranquility in the situation.

  1. It is time to take action:take action

Our negative feelings can have an invaluable purpose in advising us to do something about the circumstances put on us. We are not able to control what we are faced with in life, but we can control the way we react to situations. It may help if we try having a civil conversation with the other person involved. If you feel that isn’t an option you could ask someone trusted and neutral to mediate the conversation.

  1. Do not be hard on yourself:

Unfortunately, plans do not always work out the way we hoped they would. There might directionbe times we need to accept what has occurred just to save our peace and happiness in life.

Thank you for visiting my site today. I hope you are having a good weekend and you are feeling the best you possibly can. I also hope the information provided in this post was beneficial for you. Life can get so complicated and it is easy to become frustrated. The frustrations we feel may cause us to lash out towards the person we are upset with. I would love to read what you thought of lovethis information and promise to respond as quickly as I can!

I hope the rest of your weekend is enjoyable! Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love ❤, comfort, and many positive vibes!

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❤Always, Alyssa❤

Anger is an awful feeling

Anger-Umbrella-Listening-for-Feelings-e1356246263507-2328x1164In my opinion, anger is one of the worst emotions to experience. Anger is an intense emotional state that involves a strong uncomfortable and hostile response to a perceived provocation, hurt, or threat. Despite what some people may think, no one is perfect. We all have certain triggers that create massive amounts of anger within us, some more than others of course. Regardless of the intensity, the trigger may be, anger is a very unpleasant and useless emotion. Allowing anger to control our lives, instead of us dominating the feelings of anger is not healthy.

There are things we can do to help us gain some control of the situation and attempt to anger+6rectify the problem. Instead of throwing a toddler-like temper tantrum, which seldom gets any positive results, venting about your feelings could eliminate some of the harsh emotions before they get out of hand.

There are many anger management tips you might benefit from during a time you are feeling an intense amount of anger.

  1. Concentrate and focus on taking deep breaths. Slowly inhale and count to 4, then slowly exhale while counting to 8. Continue this exercise 4-5 more times, inhale slowly count to 4 the exhale slowly count to 8. This gets our mind off the reasons you were angry and combats your body’s tension, which will help you calm down.
  2. Acknowledge your anger as a short-lived emotion. Even though while in the moment it seems like the feeling will not ever end, try to remind yourself that it will end in a matter of time.TCA-2
  3. Get yourself out of the situation you are in. A slight change in scenery and walking away from the person causing your anger will allow you to clear your mind and calm down.
  4. Express yourself in any way you can! Allowing feelings to be bottled up is not healthy and could cause more problems in the long run. You can call a friend, partner, family member or anyone else you feel comfortable confiding in. Talking about problems is the best way to put things in perspective and help you figure out what you are truly angry about in the first place.
  5. Music can have a powerful effect on the mind and soul. You may have a few songs that never fail to calm you down when your emotions are on high alert and even make you smile again. I have several songs that can always make me happy and actually relaxed. Do you have any songs or bands that help your mind calm down?
  6. Dance around the room to a song that you can draw energy from. Not everyone is a good dance, but you do not have to be. It is just moving around and staying active that can release negative energy caused by anger. If you absolutely hate the idea of dancing around the room, it is okay any exercise can alleviate feelings of anger.
  7. Focus your mind on counting backward from 100. This very simple task can keep your mind occupied for 2 minutes or so. Just think, by silently counting for a couple of minutes, you can enjoy some peace and quiet!
  8. Close your eyes for a moment and imagine your happy place. No matter where your happy place is, having that image in your mind can calm you down drastically! My anger-management-strategies-4178870-478b9bc1a2b648a7b4bcbe7934591cf5happy place is the beach, so whenever I am feeling angry or frustrated, I picture myself at the beach listening to the sounds of the waves crashing down and the smell of saltwater in the air. Sometimes, it almost feels like I am there in the present.
  9. Consider your language and understand that some words that flood your mind are not at all helpful. Terms like always and never can be defeated words that will not allow for positive outcomes. When we are angry we tend to think nothing will ever go our way and life isn’t going to get better. We might be having a day when our pain is higher and we say to ourselves the pain is never going away and it will always be here. I have had those days and thoughts, but that did not help me feel better. Subconsciously, thoughts like these we are convincing ourselves the situation is worse than it really is.

Anger can produce various emotions and can potentially cause us to act in irrational imagesways. In the heat of the moment, it seems like an easier and better idea to act without logic; however when we act in an unreasonable manner it only creates more issues for the long-term.

While we are dealing with angry feelings there are some we should try out best to avoid. One of the worst ways we can respond to feelings of angry is by saying and doing nothing. If we try avoiding those feelings they will only continue to grow stronger because they are left to simmer in our minds. Some people think that going for a drive to clear your mind and calm their emotions is a good thing. No matter how great a driver you might be, driving angry can reduce your concentration, making getting behind the wheel hazardous. It surprises me that some 1people have the ability to go to sleep angry. It is very common that the person going to sleep angry will not get good quality sleep and therefore will be sleep deprived the following day. Sleep deprivation is only going to add to the feelings of anger and frustration. Another awful thing to do when angry is to keep the argument going. Nothing good will come from this situation and there comes a point when a break is needed to calm down! Adding alcohol to a situation with anger involved will only add fuel to the already heated fire! Basically, it is best to avoid alcohol until the situation has been handled and a resolution has been found. It is best to NEVER make any huge decisions while emotions are on high alert. Sometimes we need to place things on hold and make any decision when things are back on track because somethings will be hard if not impossible to correct.images

Thank y’all for visiting my site today. I hope the information in this post was helpful and would love to hear from you. How do you handle feelings when you are angry? I absolutely hate confrontation, so when I get upset enough to deal with this problem it is huge. I follow the rule of choose your battles! I tend to find most things people like to argue about not worth the time or stress. When something is important enough for me to engage in an argument, it just got to the point the situation needed to be handled. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love ❤, comfort, and many positive vibes!

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❤Always, Alyssa❤

Doctors gone BAD

maxresdefaultI recently had to deal with my specialist’s office, in regards to the medication I take to limit the progression of my Multiple Sclerosis. Since the doctor that diagnosed my condition retired, the office he was at has been on a downward spiral. The amount of incompetence and lack of compassion are the only things that are steadily increasing, which is terrible.

Whether it be a nurse, nurse practitioner, or physician, they all should know how awful stress is for someone with Multiple Sclerosis. Being forced to battle with a nurse with a terrible attitude 71NwQ3YsJDLto get a refill for my medication caused me nothing but massive stress and frustration. This would have been  difficult regardless, but when the nurse decided to be ugly the situation escalated unnecessarily. All I am trying to do is anything necessary so I do not have a nasty relapse, especially without insurance.

I know I mentioned in a post I did a few days ago, the flaws within healthcare in the United States, but with what I just experienced trying to talk to my doctor’s office makes it even more frustrating! For a country that has insanely high costs for health insurance, you would think patient care would be top-notch, but it is the direct opposite.

downloadThe medication I take to slow my progression down is Gilenya. I have been on this same medication for a long time, so I know the processes and the ridiculous out of pocket with NO insurance. Honestly, I do not believe any normal person could afford this medication and I definitely can’t.

Basically, I guess I am not in the right tax bracket to be able to have insurance that I can afford or at least affordable medication to keep my condition at bay. Maybe I also missed the tax bracket where kindness, respect, understanding, and empathy exist. I feel strongly that health insurance should be a RIGHT, NOT a PRIVILEGE, but surprise the powers that be don’t agree with me. I do not think anyone should have to worry about how they are going to survive without 21a1d2783f3596243d4cd630893e7e7dinsurance and without access to life-altering medication.

First, thank you for taking the time to read this post. Second, I hope none of you ever have to go through anything like this. Third, I hope your weekend has started off great and continues to bring you happiness. I do want to encourage you to leave a comment; I definitely need advice on how to deal with the ignorant people at my specialist’s office. Lord knows I can’t take too much more, especially if it is just images (2)going to be a bunch of bull shit!

I hope you enjoy every moment of your weekend and hope you feel great! Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love ❤, comfort, and many positive vibes!

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❤Always, Alyssa❤

 

 

 

3 Days Left of 2019

3-daysCan you believe there are only 3 days left of 2019? It seems like a lot has happened over the past year, heck there has been a lot of negative that has occurred over the past 3 years because of some people wanting to create as much hatred as they possibly could.

I do know there are some that would say I am cynical because I tend to blame most of what has gone wrong in the country I live in on one person in particular. Even though I do firmly believe that the president of the United States should not be in the position he is in, I do not think I am being fair blaming it all on him. The president did not get in the position he is in by himself, he had supporters that fitting-in.jpgbelieve ALL of his lies! Sadly it does not matter how many times what he says is proven to be a lie; his followers continue to blindly believe him. I do not think it is a far fetched idea to say that the president is the ruler of one of the worse and most evil cults in my lifetime!

I do try to not get too political with what I write about because it is a hot topic with many. Disagreements regarding different political beliefs cause so many problems between family and friends. Even though I may disagree with the thoughts of other, especially those that support Trump, I do still think we are all entitled to our own opinions. As strongly as I feel regarding the most if not all hot topics, I will never try to change someone’s mind because it is almost like trying to reason with someone under the influence. I mean seriously have you ever tried to talk to someone that is drunk and have that person be logical? It just isn’t plans-for-new-years-eve.pngpossible!

How are you planning to spend the last 3 days of this year? Do you have any fun plans to bring in 2020? I know that there are many people that want to go out “on the town” and celebrate with friends. I guess I am just getting old because I do not have a desire to go out and spend way too much money on alcohol and cover charges. I think it is far safer and reasonable to just bring in the New Year in the comfort of my own home!

Last year my husband and I brought in 2019 at home with our 2 adorable cats and my husband’s aunt and uncle. We had a great time and maybe spent about ¼ of images (1)the cost we would have if we went out. I have always been a little skeptical about large crowds, but recently it has gotten much worse. There have been so many mass shootings over the past few years which have created a complete lack of safety. It is terrible when you do not even feel safe going to the grocery store because there might be someone in there with a gun andmake it part of the dance bad intentions.

Thank y’all for visiting today! It is so crazy when you have so many ideas running through your head at any given time, but you just have to get all those thoughts out there! I hope you are enjoying your weekend and you are feeling well. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of     love ❤, comfort and many positive vibes!

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❤Always, Alyssa❤