How to overcome a negative mindset

Since December 9, 2021, when I was laid off from my job, my mind has been on a continuous and endless downward spiral with negativity. It has been an incredibly frustrating and discouraging month. Logically, I do understand that there was nothing I did wrong to deserve the layoff, but that is not making this situation any easier.  Considering I have always tried finding the positive in all situations in life, it is difficult for me to process all the negative emotions I have been experiencing.

One month of struggling to not allow the negative and disappointing thoughts circling in my mind has been exhausting. Too often I feel as though I am drowning in the fierce rapids that continue pulling me down. I was good at my job and the clients enjoyed working with me and I enjoyed them as well. I keep reminding myself that my job did not define who I am and that I deserve to be treated better and with respect while at work.

I find it a little insane that I can be somewhat logical about some things, and it is impossible to let go of the illogical emotions surrounding the layoff. I have been applying for many jobs daily, all have been remote because I am still nervous about COVID. From what I understand, the latest variant Omicron is extremely contagious but does not appear to be as life-threatening as the other variants. I have read that those that are vaccinated and get COVID are just having mild symptoms. The symptoms of Omicron are similar to that of a common cold, which includes cough, fatigue or tiredness, and congestion, and a runny nose.

I am going to work towards trying to find my way out of the negative and draining mindset. I always used to do say it takes more energy to be negative than it does to be positive. Through the rest of this post, I am going to share ways to deal with and break free from negative thoughts. We are human and it can be easy to fall into the negativity quicksand. There are always ways to break the cycle before drowning in our pessimistic mind, it just takes time and determination.

Surprisingly enough, one of the most beneficial ways to clear our heads and refocus is to spend time alone. It tends to be easy for introverts to spend time alone, but even extroverts can find this to be useful when they try. Under normal circumstances, I am an extrovert and enjoy the ability to meet and talk to others, but even with that said I do value time alone to get a better understanding of my thoughts.

Spending time alone helps me to contemplate life and any events that have occurred. It is especially helpful to focus my attention on the good aspects of life because even when they are challenging to see there are always good things that life offers all of us.

Remember to try keeping things in perspective. We are all going to face dilemmas or ordeals in life. During these times it is easy to feel overwhelmed and even defeated. It is in our human nature to fall into a negative mindset. The various struggles encountered in life can cause anyone to lose perspective.

We all tend to focus on the problems, instead of focusing on the solutions. This is when it is crucial to look at the bigger picture. No matter how difficult any situation is, there are still positive things happening around us. When we can focus on these, it will be much easier to overcome the negative mindset.

When we are going through troublesome times, it is important to talk to someone that is trusted. Sometimes, we may just need to vent our frustrations. This will help to lift the weight off our shoulders. Once we have talked openly and honestly with our trusted confidant, that person may help to keep this situation in perspective and eliminate negative emotions, which may help clear our negative mindset.

If I am being 100% honest and transparent, talking about what is causing me to feel negative is not easy for me. I do not like feeling as though I am burdening someone else with what I am going through in life, so I end up keeping my feeling buried deep down and all that does is cause problems to become worse and possibly create other issues. I can speak from experience when I say trying to ignore feelings is the most unhealthy way to be and I will urge you to try talking do someone!

Another concept that is important to understand is, we cannot expect everything to be perfect. If we convince ourselves through illogical ideals anything can ever be perfect, we are depriving ourselves of happiness. Trying to escape from a negative mindset will require us to fixate on realistic goals, instead of impracticable ones.

If you have never tried or even heard about the Displacement Theory, it might help to try this out! This is ending the patterns of negative thoughts by trying to replace the thoughts with something else. It is impossible to think of two things at the same time, simply choose something you would love to do and begin working towards only that! Allow the pursuit of a dream to replace the negative thoughts that are consuming your mind.

Thank you for taking the time to visit my site and read this post. If anything, I have mentioned resonates with you, I would love to hear more about what you have gone through and how you handled things. As I have already mentioned, life is not easy, and it can take effort to overcome. Like always, I am looking forward to reading your comments and I promise to respond as quickly as I can. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

Curveballs keep coming

In life the only thing that is consistent and unavoidable is challenges. No matter what we do and how much we try to do our best, life will always throw curveballs our way. Unfortunately, it is nearly impossible to duck, or miss being hit hard with the ball. All we can do is roll with the punches and adapt to the various obstacles we face. Of course, this is not easy to do, no matter how much practice we have endured.

The month of December has been extremely challenging. At the beginning of the month, I had a decent job that allowed me to work from the safety and comfort of my home. Surprisingly, but not shocking my company did a mass layoff two weeks before Christmas. Honestly, I was only shocked because of the timing. Although, logically with an employer we are only their worker bees and not a friend that anyone truly cares about.

I have been trying to stay optimistic and believe better things are coming. I keep reminding myself that when one door closes, another one will open. I have honestly always had a job, so the past three weeks have not been easy for me. At times I think it gives me too much time to think, which can be awful because of all the negativity surrounding the world.

On Christmas evening, my husband and I were on our way home when we ran into another challenge. We had to stop along the way for gas, but when we went to leave the truck would not start. Thankfully, my husband is mechanically inclined as I am anything but and he was able to quickly determine what the problem was, the fuel pump went out. He was able to get the truck to start by kicking under the truck where the fuel pump was. I would have just panicked and been in tears if he was not there.

Unfortunately, when it rains it pours and two days later, we had to have it towed to the mechanic. As luck would have it two weeks after being laid off, I ended up with an expensive repair bill. Things could have gone much worse with the fuel pump issue because we did have to drive on the interstate, and this could have caused an accident.

During the year there have been too many curveballs thrown my way and none of them missed. Yes, some of them hit harder than others and were extremely unexpected. Others were not as bad and easy to bounce back from. I cannot get these balls to miss hitting me head-on, but I will not let them stop me from living my best life.

Thank you for visiting my site. I hope you enjoyed what I have shared and possibly understand because you have been through something similar. I hope your week has gone well and you are still staying as safe as possible. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

~Overcoming challenging obstacles~

Many things that happen in life were not planned and were completely unexpected. When these unplanned situations occur, they can turn our lives upside down and inside out. What do you do to pull yourself together and continue moving forward? Do you take a break and rebuild what feels like a collapse of your life? Do you surrender to the struggles, curl up in a ball, and wait for the storm to pass? Do you keep fighting with the strength you have internally and continue living your life?

As y’all already know, I was laid off from my job last week. Of course, even though it was always in the back of my mind that layoffs could happen, I was not expecting to be laid off so close to Christmas. Over the past few days, I have been processing my emotions and trying to let go of my anger and sadness. I have decided to do everything possible to stay positive and move forward with my life. This does not mean I will not still go through moments when I am irate and then sad, but I am going to try not letting these negative emotions consume and destroy my happiness.

Going through hard times happens to everyone, but there are several ways to overcome hard times. I hope the following ways to overcome hard times will help you the next time you face challenges, struggles, and or hardships.

One of the most important things is to understand, things will not always be as difficult as they are initially, and they will get easier. I have always believed that everything in life happens for a reason and something better is waiting for us. We cannot change the hardships when they occur, all we can do is accept and embrace them, and carry on.

With any struggle we endure there are valuable lessons to learn. The struggles we experience during our life offers us the strength we will need for tomorrow, next week, and or next year. I will admit any struggle I go through I always ask myself the same questions, “Why me?” “What did I do to deserve this?” “Why is this happening to me?” I understand blaming bad situations on my bad luck or anyone else does not fix or change anything. Accepting that no one is perfect and identifying our faults can help welcome change and improvements into our life!

Struggles can be exhausting, painful, and incredibly stressful. For our mental health we must try living for the day. Do not worry about what happened yesterday or last week, do not worry about what could happen tomorrow, just think about the current moment. If we are always worried about tomorrow, next week, next month, or next year, our anxiety will continuously be extremely high, and this is an unhealthy way to live our short life.

Understanding what you can control and what you have no control over is very important. We can control our actions and reactions, but we do not have any control over anyone else’s actions or reactions. When we learn to let go of controlling others or things, we can solely focus inward!

We often feel alone when we are going through a challenging time in life. It is always important to have someone that you can trust and be able to talk with them open and honestly. I know without a doubt that my three cats know how I am feeling all the time and they are delighted that I am with them more now that I do not have a job. I think everyone knows how much I love animals and that we treat our cats like they are our children because they kind of are! Anyone that goes through something difficult in life that leaves them feeling lost needs a sweet furry friend that can make anyone smile!

On Sunday evening, I had a nice chat with my former supervisor about the layoffs. Not the supervisor I reported to at the time of the layoff, the one I was working with for a few weeks before that I just adore and respect. Chatting with her, made things feel a little better because she did not know what was going to happen on Thursday and I trust what she says. This makes me think that “maybe” my supervisor did not know as well, but I will never know what she did or did not know.

Being able to view this layoff situation in a more positive mindset means I will have more time to do the things I love and that give me the outlet needed in life. I am thankful that I will be able to focus more on building on my writing skills and learn of other ways to use the skills I learn. I have always enjoyed writing and working 40 hours a week made it difficult because at the end of the day, I was always too exhausted to focus on writing. I am also going to have more time to read the books I have been wanting to read.

Thank you for taking the time to visit my site today and read what I have shared. I always welcome your comments, which I will respond to even faster now because I have the time. I hope you had a great and safe weekend, and your week starts great and gets even better with each day that passes. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa