I hope y’all have had a wonderful week and you are looking forward to the weekend. I managed to fall behind with my blog and still have a few comments to respond to. The past few days I have been consumed with either a migraine or back pain that was so awful I could hardly do anything. Wednesday morning, my back pain was in a different location than normal. On a typical day, it is my mid to lower back that is in pain, but Wednesday morning it was only in my lower back and it took me at least fifteen minutes to pull myself from the bed. This pain was like nothing I have experienced before and had me mildly concerned. I did not lift anything in the previous days, so it did not make sense and I detest when things do not make sense.
I started having another mean migraine on Wednesday that nothing would help it to ease up. Having a migraine and the unusual back pain was extremely frustrating and nothing was making any sense. I detest when things do not make sense because I am the type that needs logical answers. I guess with Multiple Sclerosis, answers are one thing I may never get.
I would assume I know why there were so many issues with pain and a migraine. I do believe I could make an educated guess because after dealing with this unpredictable and hateful illness and knowing my body better than anyone else. My assumption for these issues is none other than stress. I feel like I continue getting bad news daily almost like there is a sign on my head saying, “Please do something that is going to create more problems in life” on my forehead. I mean getting laid off on December 9th and two weeks later having my truck in the shop with an expensive repair, and then on Wednesday learning that my former company is not paying out for the PTO I did not use threw me into the worst stress tailspin.
I was counting on the PTO payout for bills, my husband’s birthday, and a few other things. I cannot say I am surprised that my former company was going to screw me over again. Apparently, my former company thinks it is perfectly acceptable to basically steal money from me and it seems they can do that legally.
I have been constantly looking for another job and it has been beyond frustrating. Many places are hiring for remote positions, but it has been almost a month and I am still unemployed. Being unemployed is causing my personality to change and I do not like it. I feel like my anger about what has occurred and keeps happening is causing me to be a little hateful. I love my cats more than I can explain, but my mood even has me being angry with them and not wanting to be anywhere around them.
I am trying my best to stay positive, but it is becoming harder every day. I keep trying to tell myself that everything happens for a reason and the perfect job is out there for me and will surface when the time is right. I do not know what I did wrong in a previous life to have to continue dealing with challenges, but whatever it was I am so sorry. I just really need a break and have something, just one small thing happen work out.
I am working on another post and will hopefully have it completed tonight. I have also been working on a short story to help build on the creativity I know that I have inside. Writing has been an outlet for me and even though two of my cats are doing everything possible to not let me write because they want my attention, it is still the only thing that lets me escape from reality.
Thank you for visiting my site today. I appreciate your time and look forward to reading your comments. I will be responding to comments today and tomorrow, so I will be caught up soon. I hope you have a lovely and safe weekend. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!