Decision Made

~Decisions are not my strength, so this was HUGE~

I believe I mentioned in a previous post that I started a part-time job on Tuesday. I gave this job all that I could and tried to not pass judgment until I had more information. I accepted the position because I was desperate to have a job. Also, by the description that was explained to me, I thought it might be interesting and challenging. After day one, I could tell it was nothing like I thought it was going to be. I am a little too stubborn and did not want to feel like I was a failure and give up. I ended up trying for two more days, but it only became clearer that the job was not the right position for me.

The truth is my personality is not able to follow a script when making calls because I feel it sounds too impersonal and automated. I did try adjusting the “script” we were supposed to read, but it only helped make me feel more comfortable. Even after making the script a little lighter and more personal, I did not feel good about myself. I was feeling like the company was preferring us to lie and that is not what I signed up for. I do remember saying in my interview that I am unable to lie and when asked questions, I was going, to be honest.

After three short days with the job, I made the decision I thought was best for me and resigned. I cannot view this as a failure because the company failed me from the start by being deceitful. Another problem I had with the job is I was supposed to use my personal laptop, which is absurd.

When I was at my last job, you know the one that laid me off right before Christmas, I never dreaded clocking into work. I enjoyed what I was doing. At my former job, I was reviewing mortgage loan applications to determine what was missing and request the documents before being able to get the loan purchased. It sounds boring to most people because it was all about auditing.

I know the right job for me is out there and I will keep searching for it. While I continue my job search, I will be able to focus on other things that interest me. There is another writing competition that I am planning to participate in. I just must think of topics I can use for the personal essay will be on, but now I have time for that. I can also keep building my skills through my blog!

I spent the past two mornings waking up way too early. I woke up Thursday at 3:30 AM and Friday at 4:30 AM. I was not able to fall back asleep. This makes me think the way the job was may have been interfering with my sleep. Subconsciously, I may have been trying to justify continuing to work for the company, while knowing it was all wrong for me.

I know y’all write because you have your blog. Have you ever done a writing competition? If you have, how did you decide on the topic you were going to write about? I have several ideas but cannot decide which is best to write about. Of course, with the lack of sleep, I have had over the past two days my decision-making abilities might not be up to par. Yes, I did make the decision to resign from the job under these circumstances, but I did talk it over with my husband first and he is logical. I am truly thankful for how incredibly understanding and supportive my husband was yesterday morning. He made it clear to me, I deserved MUCH better.

Thank you for visiting my site today. I always appreciate how supportive you are and love reading your comments. I hope you enjoyed reading what I have shared today. Maybe you have been through something similar and have some perspective you can share with me. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

8 thoughts on “Decision Made

  1. When you are not comfortable with an organization’s ethics and feel that you are being asked to do things that go against your values …. leaving is a symbol of your personal,integrity!!! I have refused to do some things and I have declined well paying job offers for that same reason. Proud of you!

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    • Thank you, Byron. I almost felt guilty about resigning, but I promise they lied to me from the start. And, I do not like using my own laptop. I think the company is a crap shoot and I think they are not doing right by their employees or the LO’s they are trying to do something with.

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  2. I have never been in a blogging or writing competition so I don’t really have any advice there. IMO though, people write or talk best about things they are passionate about. Good luck to you! That could be exciting…and yay about the job…or lack thereof 😛

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you, Grace! I know you are correct about the writing competition. I had an idea to write about my late grandfather because he inspired me, but when I mentioned it to my mother she did not think it was a good idea. I think I know why and it is not a good reason. I think I did the right thing with the job. It was a crap shoot and nothing good would come from it!

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      • I wont claim that I have good ideas, but it totally sucks when I THINK I have one and people rain on my parade. I say write what you want to! (now you know why “im the one your mother warned you about”…lol)

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  3. Good luck with the job hunt Alyssa! You’re not a failure even if you resigned after only 3 days of the job. It was better that you did rather than sticking at it and pretending that you liked it when you didn’t,a t least you were honest with the company. Until then, try to relax a little and take some time of to do the things you enjoy. Xx

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