The day that changed my life forever

I can vividly remember this day eight years ago when the world lost an amazing soul. I remember exactly where I was, who I spoke to and what was said, and what occurred for days, weeks, months, and years later. My husband and I were gearing up for an anniversary trip to Florida and I had just left the tanning salon when I heard a voicemail from my uncle requesting that I call him. Considering I do not typically hear from him because over the years we grew apart, I was instantly concerned and immediately called him back.

The words that left my uncle’s mouth changed my life forever. My uncle was calling to inform me that my grandfather who I idolized had lost his battle with cancer. This news jarred my mind, heart, and soul because I had a deep connection and love for my grandfather. I guess I could say that in my mind, my grandfather could beat anything and would live forever, but that childish thought was proven to be very incorrect.

I always had an incredible amount of admiration for my late grandfather because he had a heart of goal and was extremely thoughtful, loving, fair, considerate, and much more. Much of the way my late grandfather was has been instilled into me, which I am and always will be forever thankful for. I do not think there will ever be a way to be as wonderful as he was, but I will never give up trying.

Unfortunately, I think it is normal for people to disappoint others, but my grandfather never once disappointed me. I could always count on this man because he loved his family so purely and deeply. His core values were inspiring, encouraging, motivating, honest, generous, optimistic, and so much more, which I hope to carry with me until I see him again.

Although my grandfather passed away eight years ago, his spirit will live on within my heart and soul for the rest of my life. I know that he is watching over me and even though I cannot hear his voice, I can feel his presence when I am going through difficult times. He has always been a voice of reason and logic, where is rare in the world today. At the lowest and most difficult times during my life, my grandfather’s voice would ring in my ears, and everything became much easier to handle. He even made being diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis when I was only 19 years old easier to tolerate.

Every year on my grandfather’s birthday and the day he passed away, I have a difficult time. However, please do not mistake this because I will be forever thankful for the times I had with my grandfather and do feel like his life should be celebrated and I know he would not want me to be sad, but there is still an ache and emptiness in my heart from losing him.

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I think I have mentioned this in a previous post, but my grandfather was a writer for his local newspaper and was an amazing pro-golfer. I do not know the first thing about golf but would love to believe I get my love for writing from my grandfather. The only thing that helps me deal with my emotions, positive or negative is to write about them, which is the reason I am writing about my grandfather on the eight-year anniversary of his death. Writing may not always take the sting of the pain away, but it does help me to let everyone reading this post understand how wonderful and amazing my grandfather was. There will never be a day that I am not thankful to have had James Bucky O’Brien for a grandfather because some of my best qualities were derived from him.

Thank you for visiting my site today. I wish there was a way to express even more how much my grandfather meant to me and how much I hope I am making him proud of who I am today because this is extremely important to me. I do not think I will ever be half the person he was, but I will never give up trying to be the best part of myself I can be. I hope your week is going well and you are staying safe. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love, comfort, support, and MANY positive vibes!

Always, Alyssa

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