What is your first thought when you hear the word bitter? Have you ever felt bitter towards another person? The word bitter actually has two means that cover two different things. The first meaning is a sharp taste, with no sweetness. The other one is what I am discussing today, which is anger and disappointment at being treated unfairly, which can turn into resentment. Resentment is another emotion that is awful to feel because it is a combination of disappointment, disgust, anger, and fear.
We do not want to carry feelings of bitterness for an extended person of time because it is very distressing. We need to be able to acknowledge what we are dealing with as valid before we are able to move on.
I am going to share some helpful tips to move on from these feelings of bitterness onto a more positive future.
- Take a step back
We all know how easy it can be to get caught up in our emotions. It is pretty natural to forget to give ourselves time and space to breathe. If we try removing ourselves from the situation that is causing bitter feelings, we can gain a new perspective. Detaching from these experiences for a period of time is important to do before continuing with this process.
- Write it down
Sometimes it can be challenging to process emotions in our minds. Expressing yourself by writing down the way you are feeling can serve as a way of taking control of a situation while also admitting there is something that is upsetting you. Writing whether in a journal or just on a blank piece of paper can make an enormous difference when struggling with feelings of bitterness.
- Talk it out
For some people, putting a voice on their feelings works wonders, but it is still beneficial to add journaling along with this. Talking about our feelings helps us to confront the way we are feeling. This also enables us to rid our minds of guilt, which is commonly felt by the one that is bitter.
Containing feelings of stress and resentment will only continue to grow. Guilt is an enormous part of resentment because we are feeling guilty about a past decision and regret how we might have treated someone else.
- Don’t talk too much
While it is important to talk things out, we need to be mindful of how we speak. As much as talking things out is important, it can also cause us to relive those emotions as if it were the first time feeling them.
Our feelings of bitterness tend to build up over time and then take a while to dwindle from our thoughts. Every time we go over the reason for our bitterness, the great the chances we will get all worked up again. It is okay to rant or complain as much as we need to, but it would be best to set boundaries. For instance, we could set certain days or times during the week to have our rant sessions.
It is natural to want explanations and solutions for why we are upset. Even with that said, going over the issue over and over again probably won’t change anything. It is crucial to find a balance between expressing our emotions and living our life.
Even if it is for just 15 minutes a day, meditation is an effective self-improvement activity. It will allow time completely to yourself each day to find out how you actually feel.
The feelings of bitterness tend to be surrounding us, which can become overwhelming and consume our every thought. We can become obsessed with the bitterness we feel and forget to check daily how we truly feel. If we can utilize meditation as a tool to investigate our inner mind, the way we actually are feeling, not always how we think we are feeling. This can help shift away from those bitter feelings and move towards positive thoughts.
- Get your blood pumping
Any type of exercise, whether it be running or practicing yoga, releases the endorphins that make us feel good. Doing something active to help change our mindset, gives us the opportunity to not only offer the self-respect we deserve but also embraces physical change.
When we are feeling bitter towards another person, it might be because of insecurities we are feeling about ourselves. We could be insecure because of our personality or even our appearance. Sometimes taking control by taking care of ourselves might change how we feel about who we are and what we look like. The better we feel about ourselves, the more positive we will feel and less resentful.
- Confront it
It is rather normal to find ourselves suddenly feeling resentful. We may feel frustrated, upset, or even angry, but we need to move on from these feelings. Once we have recognized our feelings by writing and or talking, it is time to take the next step in the process.
Are you able to identify who is at fault? If you honestly believe someone else is at fault, is this person partially or fully at fault? How will you confront this person? The confrontation should not be hostile, disingenuous, or filled with rage. It will be much more effective and healthy to simply explain how you feel and preferably get closure. Also, avoid finger-pointing for the blame; it will not solve the issues.
The goal is to find a way that suits both people to move forward. This could mean modifying your own actions or requesting the other person to be more aware of your feelings.
- Be accountable
We need to be mindful of how we react to situations because the way we react might trigger feelings of bitterness. Others might spark feelings of regret or even make us feel bad, but we need to look inside ourselves as well.
Ask yourself, why do I immediately feel bitter? Why do I struggle with some feelings more than others? These questions aren’t easy to answer, but they are necessary. It is natural to ignore our involvement with certain feelings as a way to protect ourselves.
Learning our triggers can help us learn healthy ways to avoid these triggers and how to adjust our behaviors appropriately.
- Set goals and make plans
We need to start taking an active role in our life, as opposed to being passive about life. We should add things to our calendar that make us feel good and happy. These can be short-term or long-term goals. Maybe we want to join a gym or start a new hobby, it can make us feel good and show that we are taking care of ourselves.
We will quickly become used to enjoying things and looking forward to these things we enjoy. It will be seen that you are worth what makes you happy and in control whether we do those things or not.
- Determine your future
Our attachment to the past is what causes feelings of resentment and bitterness. Our unwillingness to let go of the past holds onto the discomfort we do not want to have. Feeling bitter can be linked to the lack of the closure we desired. We need to make the decision to have a future without the emotions or bitterness and resentment.
Thank you for visiting my site today. I hope this information was helpful for you and provided you with the knowledge to help you get through difficult times. I know we all experience challenging times, so it is beneficial to have tips on at least some of those times. I hope your week has started off great and continues to get better. Please never forget that I am always sending y’all LOTS of love , comfort, and many positive vibes!
Reblogged this on Survivors Blog Here.
Thank you for this excellent article, it says many of the things I believe in deeply. Bitterness is a flavour no-one should taste for their live. Savoury and sweet are far better flavours for a good and meaningful life!
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I am so glad you enjoyed this article! I think it is easy to feel bitter, especially when many things go wrong. I also agree that bitter taste is far better than having bitter feelings!
Yes, but only a little bit of bitter, and sweetness makes it better!
I just wanted to let you know I have enjoyed reading all of your blogs and today you said what I needed to hear! I have been battling resentment for a very long time and you made me realize that it’s not always my fault! My self esteem is gone but that doesn’t affect my judgment and I may tell this one soon! Thank you for blogging with me! Also how do you change your script and add pictures or quotes? I can’t figure this one out🤗
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I am so glad this post was helpful for you! I think it is easy to have feelings of bitterness and resentment. I also understand that part of low to no self-esteem. I hope the information in this post, will be helpful!
I search Google for the pictures and for the quotes I want!
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Great post! And you’re really getting the hang of writing in the freelance style! 🙂
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Thank you Holly! I am trying my best. Two closed and I am not sure why. Another one is going to be setting up phone calls towards the end of the week!