Very Special Man!

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PoppyWhen I was younger there was always ONE voice that could make ANY situation better with just a few simple words. There was that ONE person who I held so dear to my heart❤ that could find the positive side in anything and everything in life. I had that ONE person that made everything better with his wise and very loving words. I admired this man more than words could ever even begin to describe because he knew ONLY love❤ and showed it with all he did in his life. My beloved Grandfather, who I actually called ❤Poppy, was literally the most amazing, admirable and loving people in this entire world! He touched the lives of so many with his kind and loving heart! 

Way back 18 years ago when I was first diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis terrified and extremely sad, I called my Poppy in tears.  He calmly listened through my tears and offered his never-ending support, love❤ and great advice. The words he spoke has stuck with me through the years as he said, “Alyssa, you are strong and can handle anything this illness may inflict on you. But always remember no matter what struggles you may endure, someone else is always going through something worse, so stay strong.” I know just how true his statement is because even when things feel really bad, they could definitely be far worse. At this time I did share with him my fears that I could lose my ability to walk and be wheelchair bound and at the young age I was that was frightening. But he told me to never put thought in something negative until I am actually faced with it and that was wonderful advice.

My sweet Poppy passed away September 9, 2013, but I still remember all the words ofpoppys grave encouragement he shared with me through the years. In the times I am in a terrible amount of pain or feel a massive amount of stress, I hear his voice in my mind with all of his healing powers.

For some reason these past few weeks have been very difficult for me. My pain levels have been elevated drastically and the stress weighing on my mind has been at a HIGH! Some of this stress is the upcoming MRI that I found out today needs additional information from the MSAA. I have sent several emails to the person that was helping me, with NO response yet. But staying logical, I will try again tomorrow as this MRI has already been scheduled! I guess it is possible that some of the stress is I am over thinking EVERY aspect of life and have a difficult time letting go! I am very passionate about many things in life and do not accept “It is what it is and there is nothing we can do!” If I keep remembering my Poppy’s words, if we all stand strong, there is always something that can be done! I guess this is where I got my notion to NEVER GIVE UP!

I think it is very clear that my Poppy was my role model in life and I will always strive to be as much like him as I possibly can! There will never be another man like him, but I My Poppyguess that is what makes him so special. You know that being diagnosed with a chronic illness is tragic and life altering, but losing him was twice as hard on me. I know it has almost been 5 years, but it feels like yesterday when I got the call from my Uncle to tell me Poppy had passed away. I honestly felt as though my world came to a complete halt! If I had just one wish, which I know most people would think I would wish the MS away, but I would wish I could have just one more day with my Poppy. I would rather live with the struggles of Multiple Sclerosis for the rest of my life, if I could just have him here with us again. I would love to be in the car with him listening to him sing “Seven Spanish Angels” by Willie Nelson & Ray Charleshttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x8A9Y1Dq_cQ as those were the best and most memorable days for me. 

Thank you for stopping by my site today and reading this extremely emotional post. I must say this was the hardest post I have written and could not make it through without many tears. I truly wish that my Poppy would not only be proud of this post, but also of all the others that I have written. Always remember to cherish those you love❤ and make sure they know how you feel because unfortunately there is a time they are meant to move onto the next level and be in Heaven. I hope you have a nice and relaxing evening. Please always remember I am sending you LOTS of love❤ and comfort.

My signature heart

❤Always, Alyssa❤

47 thoughts on “Very Special Man!”

  6. Alyssa…………I could feel the love, respect and admiration you feel towards poppy……….so wonderful you had such an amazing person in your life. I know he is looking after you and so proud of all you have done through this journey……….

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    • Thank you so much! I have always heard that loss gets easier in time, but I still feel this loss strong even after 5 years.
      Oh wow you were diagnosed at 18 as well? It is crazy how young we were, but in some ways it is a good thing. Catching things when we are young allows for us to gain control of things earlier which hopefully allows us to slow the progression down.

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  9. This is beautiful Alyssa. What a great way to remember him. I recently lost my grandfather and he will always have a special space in my heart but that emptiness will never go away.
    He will live in your heart forever. If I had to choose with living with my chronic illness or having my Grandpa back in my life I would much rather choose having him too and this loss was much greater than anything else I had ever experienced. It’s beautiful that you always remember his words and know he will be proud of you and he will be watching you blog from above.

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    • I am so sorry you recently lost your grandfather, I know it is heartbreaking. There is always an empty place in our hearts that vanished the moment we lost our special grandfather.
      Thank you for saying that my dear Poppy is watching over me and watching my blog, he was actually a writer in his younger days, so I hope he would be proud.
      It is amazing how big a piece of our heart rests with those we lost.
      I hope you have a nice Friday and a lovely weekend!

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      • I guess that’s where you’ve got your amazing writing skills from.
        You’re so good you know, I could never write like that.
        He will always be there in your heart and everytime you post something he is there in spirit. He is so proud of you and the way that you make a difference in people’s lives like myself with your motivational Mondays.

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      • I guess that could be as I did idolize my grandfather!!

        Yes, he will definitely always live on in my heart and I believe he watches over me daily!
        I am glad you enjoy my Motivational Mondays! I think we all need motivation sometimes and I am glad I am able to do this!

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  11. Oh Alyssa — I am so sorry for your sadness. I would have never known how sad you have been lately (you mask your hurts and stress in your positive words and outlook). My daughter does that too — that is not good for you. Be sure you are sharing the real deep down inside of you with someone. I too wish you still had Poppy as a nice spot to process when it hurts the most. Poppy looks like a strong, knowledgeable, wise, thoughtful, kind and caring soul. Clearly his lifetime was filled with success and love!! I love that you had him and I would guess he is still there when you need him!!!! Take care sweet Alyssa!!

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    • Yes, I am really good at masking the pain I feel emotionally and even physically. I find writing with a positive tone helps me so much. The funny thing is, I tend to bottle up feeling and when they do finally come out it is like a tornado and hurricane all in one!
      Oh Poppy was absolutely amazing and so strong until the very end. We lived so far apart, he was in MA and I am in NC. I wanted to go see him, but he did not want me to. Probably the pride in him or he just didn’t want me to see him in the state he was in. He was precious, honesty and incredibly loving. Even though he isn’t here physically, he will always be in my heart!

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  12. Your Poppy will always be proud of you for all the good you are doing for others. He loves you and is watching you every day. He’s amazed by your selflessness and kind acts you do every day for so many people. He’s proud that you’re not wallowing in your own sorrows but taking all that energy and doing something positive. He always thought the world of you and will never forget you. He’s in your heart and guides you through each day with his love and support. Don’t be sad. Always remember the good he brought to your life and the special times you had together. Nobody can ever take that from you. Keep making him proud! All my Love & Support💜

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    • Thank you Mom! I sure hope he would be proud of what I am trying to do because I would want nothing more. I do still wish I was there with him when he passed on, but he didn’t want it that way. I know he was considering my feelings because that is just who he was. Even though he isn’t here physically, he will always live on in my heart! I will always cherish his memories and do the best I can to be like he was.

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  13. Hi Alyssa;
    I am so thankful that we found each other on this amazing road of life. I really appreciate the sentiment and love you shared here. Your relationship with your Grandfather is truly something worth its weight in gold, and will get easier to explore with time, although these wounds don’t ever close completely we do get to the point where we remember and live by what they taught us with an easier acceptance of them having moved on.

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  15. Very beautfiul post, he sounds like a person I would have like to meet. He will always be with you as I believe they really never leave you, you have him in your heart, and in spirit. His love and wisdom lives through you.

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  18. This coming September will be five years since his passing. And I am certain you miss him as much today as you did at the time of your loss. May he forever rest in peace. And remember, he lives in your heart through the beautiful memories you breathe.

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