It is okay to not be okay all the time

okayIt has taken me a really long time to realize that it is okay and perfectly normal to admit to not being okay all of the time! We are all just human and we all have times when we do not feel like our normal selves, as I said this is normal and there is not anything wrong with it! For some of us, including myself, it is not easy to admit to ourselves let alone anyone else that we are really not okay, but possibly struggling to keep pushing forward. Pain inflicts so many hardships to our lives and that pain can and does cause much sadness, fatigue, irritation and even bitterness.

As y’all already know, I have been dealing with a lot pain and muscle spasms, which you also know is extremely frustrating! Last week I had planned to increase my work hours, but unfortunately was not able to do this because of the intense pain I was experiencing. Trying to remain positive I thought, “It is okay, I will just try again next week.” Well that would be this week and so far it is not happening again. I did work 6 hours yesterday, but I was not able to go to work today.

dont-give-up-galaxy-hold-on-hope-Favim.com-1428490I will continue to refuse to give up and I also refuse being too hard on myself because at least I am trying! I want to be able to work “normal” hours, but more than that I want all this pain to give me a break even for one day! As crazy as this may sound, I am standing by my decision to not share this information with my specialist. Do I think she could give me any additional information that I do not already know after living with this illness for almost 18 years? My answer to this question is a FIRM NO! I will not struggle 1subject my body to even more steroids than I have already dealt with and I do not want to switch medications again! Prior to June 2017, I was on Gilenya for 6 years and it seemed to have worked well for me. My reasons for changing the medication was because I was dealing with horrible sinus issues and I thought it was due to the Gileyna, but now I see things differently!

With this horrible leg pain, which is also causing much additional back pain, I want to find some leg stretches that may help me even just a little! Do any of you do any leg stretches that you find beneficial and if so what are they? I know many of you know and understand what I am going through and I value your advice and opinions so much more than I can even explain❤!

❤ I hope y’all have had a great day and I appreciate you visiting my site today. I hope your evening is filled with much happiness and relaxation! I am really looking forward to reading your amazing comments! As always I am sending y’all LOTS of ❤love and comfort!

Love 2

❤Always, Alyssa❤

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41 thoughts on “It is okay to not be okay all the time

  1. Great read! Beautifully written. I totally understand why you don’t want to pass the info on to the dr. After so long of dealing you can predict what will be said/done. Sometimes we just have to okay the waiting game and hope for the best. Much love to you sweet girl. You’re in my prayers always

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I’m gonna play devil’s advocate here…..why NOT tell your neuro that you are experiencing so much pain? I would make sure that it is documented somewhere….. There is no reason to change drugs either if you are comfortable with what you are on. The reason I say get it documented somewhere is because once you have moved and gotten settled with a new doc, and she gets your medical records, he/she is going to ask why you havent dealt with it before….remember we are in an opiod epidemic…. DOCUMENT THE HELL out of your pain and everything that it prevents you from doing.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you Grace, I appreciate what you have stated. My reason for not telling my neuro anything is because not only does she dismiss what I say, she also is extremely rude! I feel pretty confident I know what is going on and hearing her confirm what I think is happening will only irritate me and cause me way too much stress. If things do not start to improve soon, I will reach out to her. This doctor has nothing to do with any of my pain meds because of laws requiring “pain” specials. I have been sure everything is always documented and request all notes and other documents that they make, really to cover my own ass! I became the doctors worse nightmare for everything I ask for. Again, thank you SO much for your advice and amazing comment. I hope your week is going well and I hope you are feeling great!!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Hugs in spirit! It’s so frustrating when MS puts up another barrier to doing things. Are you still searching for stretches? Yoga poses help. Where are your muscle spasms? There are poses that focus on specific muscle groups and can be done on the floor.

    Maybe your neuro can give you a referral to a physical therapist instead of drugs. Another option could be acupuncture. My MIL swears by it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you so much! I am still trying to find some good stretches to help the tightness and spasms I experience. The spasms are in my legs and arms, normally my right arm more than the left.
      I really appreciate your comment! When my husband and I get our move completed and I find a new neuro in the new city, I will definitely ask about therapy. I do not really want to start something where we are living now, only to move in a month or 2. Thank you so much for your help!!!

      Like

  4. Great post as always! It is uplifting despite your discomfort… sorry for your pain! 😥

    I happen to stretch nearly everyday and know some great stretches… let me try to get pictures to you so that they can help you too. 🤗

    Liked by 1 person

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