Today was just another day trying to work towards my goal of increasing my hours. I found that now I am doing better early on in the day, which is opposite that it was a few weeks ago. After working non stop for four hours I started to feel my body start aching and the headache start to slowly come back, but that might have been from staring at the computer for too long. But, I do think overall I am slowly getting better. A few weeks ago I would be crying and hardly able to move because I was in so much pain, but now things are nowhere near that level!
Tomorrow is going to be a very busy day because we have one person out sick and another person whose wife just had a baby today. My small team of co-workers just decreased by half! I told my manager that I was going to try to get to work earlier tomorrow and stay a little later than I have been, but that I would not leave until my half of the work was completed. I get pretty determined and ambitious at times! I also told him that next week I am not promising to be back at 40 hours a week, but I would do as much as possible and wanted to just play my time by ear for now. He was very understanding and told me he definitely wants me to be back to work full time, but did not want me to rush myself. I do believe that my manager knows I value my work and want to be able to give all I do 100% but right now I do not have that ability, but I will get there!
I do know already that MS flare ups can last anywhere from a few days to months before all the symptoms have passed. The last terrible flare up I had was probably 8 years ago and I was out of work for 2 months, which was so frustrating for me. I have had a few minor set backs since that last bad flare up 8 years ago, but I only had to miss work a few days before I was back to my “normal” self. I really can not complain because as long as I take care of myself, rest enough and stay on the damn Gilenya, I do not think I will have anything too detrimental happen again for hopefully years. I know I need to learn to relax more and stress A LOT less I am trying, but I am 36 years old so it is hard to change old habits.
Speaking of learning to relax more and stress less, I started a fabulous book today. My new book, that might end up being what I live by is called “Get Your Shit Together” by Sarah Knight. The key thing that caught my eye right away is she says, “How to stop worrying about what you should do so you can finish want you need to do.” I have a problem when I am always thinking about what I think “needs” to be done and forget the things that I actually want to finish. This book is a very easy and fun read, but I will warn you ahead of time she might use a lot of profanity which I guess the title gives that away. I truly love how real Sarah seems to be as she writes, which I find really inspiring. She does not try to sugar coat what we all sometimes do wrong when we make plans or allow for more obligations to our lives that are not needed. I am really enjoying this book, so of course I wanted to share this with y’all!
Thank you for reading and commenting on my thoughts for the day! Now that I am starting to feel better I am able to focus a lot better on my writing. I think there have been a few days that I was all over the place but I had so much building up in my mind and writing is how I can deal with those thoughts! Now that I am thinking clearly I will be able to continue my flash backs of when I was first diagnosed. I hope that what I went through all those years ago will be able to help someone else that maybe dealing with something similar now.
Until next time, I hope y’all have a great and relaxing evening! Take care and thank you again for all of your continued support!